


Nobody But You - A "Mon Petit Chou" Trilogy SideFic

by TDKeh16



Series: "Mon Petit Chou" Series [6]
Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst and Feels, Angst with a Happy Ending, Best Friends, Fluff and Smut, Hand Jobs, Hausgiving, Holidays, M/M, Mild Smut, Mutually Unrequited, New Year's Eve, Oral Sex, Past Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Secret Relationship, Unrequited Love, Valentine's Day, bros being bros
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-24
Updated: 2016-06-20
Packaged: 2018-06-10 12:02:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 22,446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6955759
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TDKeh16/pseuds/TDKeh16
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The next time they kissed had been during a night like this, the first time they started fooling around. Things had become intense too quickly and the mutual decision to avoid kissing on the lips in the future had made sense at the time, but Holster quickly regretted it. He wanted to kiss Ransom. He liked kissing Ransom. He loved kissing Ransom... Because he loved Ransom.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I swear this "trilogy" will be over after this fic lol. After chatting to some people I couldn't resist writing out what had been going on behind the scenes with R & H throughout the Zimbits' "Mon Petit Chou Trilogy" and Dex's "Lose Control" sidefic. Like Lose Control, this fic starts after (during) Hausgiving night and will follow along from there to Winter Screw/the Haus Party in December and beyond.  
> This is a little smuttier than I'm used to writing, but well, this is happening lol.  
> Enjoy!

"Adam..."

Holster's eyes snapped open. He would not be sleeping any time soon, not with the noises sneaking up through the floor from Bitty's room for the second night in a row. "Yeah, Rans?"

"Can't sleep. Can you?"

"No dude, who could?" Holster's hypothetical question was met with silence. There was a lot that was wrong with this situation, yet here they were again. He knew where this was headed the moment his best friend called him 'Adam' instead of Holster. "Wanna come down here?"

"Yeah," Ransom climbed off the top bunk and joined Holster in his bed. It was not the first time they had done this, though it had been a while.

Holster had managed to resist the temptation to invite Ransom into his bed the night before, but the combination of alcohol and the sexy moans from their petit hausmate's room was too much. "Fuck..." He moaned when Ransom wasted no time sliding a hand into his boxers. Ransom bit down lightly on his shoulder when Holster eagerly reciprocated. " _Fuck...!_ "

"Sorry! Did that hurt?" Ransom pulled back momentarily.

"Nah, it's good."

Ransom covered the spot with a gentle kiss and Holster moaned again. "Better? Ah!" He gasped when Holster took them both in one hand and started stroking. "Fuck, bro! I love your big hands..."

"Yeah?" Holster asked with a breathy chuckle, delighting in the way Ransom's hands clung desperately to his bare back.

"Uh-huh..." Ransom panted. "Fuck, this is so wrong..."

Holster winced, thankful that his friend's forehead was currently pressed against his shoulder so that he could not see his face. There was a lot wrong with this, and Holster ran the list through his head. It was wrong for them to be listening to their friends have sex, although they did not actually have much choice in that. It was definitely wrong for them to get so turned on and use it as fuel to fool around. It was also wrong that they were doing this while Ransom had yet to properly break things off with March, the girl from the volleyball team he had been seeing off and on for the past few months. True, he had stopped calling and things were essentially over, but still. 

What was worse, was how much Holster wanted it to feel "right" for once, or rather, wanted it to feel right to _Ransom_. In moments like this, nothing felt more right to Holster. The heat from their bodies pressed together, the way they synchronized their movements, the small shockwaves he felt ripple his nerves when Ransom kissed him anywhere he could reach from the neck down.

Holster could not handle it any longer. He grabbed Ransom's head with his free hand and tilted his face, finally kissing his lips. They had only kissed a few times since meeting each other, the first being during a drunken game of truth or dare during their freshman year. The second time had followed later that same night after a few more beers, making out in Holster's bed back in the dorms.

The next time they kissed had been during a night like this, the first time they started fooling around. Things had become intense too quickly and the mutual decision to avoid kissing on the lips in the future had made sense at the time, but Holster quickly regretted it. He wanted to kiss Ransom. He liked kissing Ransom. He _loved_ kissing Ransom... Because he _loved Ransom_.

"Wait," Ransom pulled back, the cool air rushing to fill the space between their bodies made both men shiver.

"Sorry, I- I know we said we wouldn't, but I..." Holster trailed off. He was not sure if it was a good idea to keep talking in his current state, the alcohol in his veins and the heat of the moment had loosened his tongue. "I really want to kiss you."

Ransom sat up and Holster's heart sank. Had he said too much? Was Ransom going back to his own bed? They weren't even done. Ransom's eyes travelled down the blond's body for a moment. "Okay."

"What?" There was barely a moment to think before Ransom had rolled Holster flat on his back and straddled his hips. "You..."

"This okay?" Ransom bent down to kiss him.

"Yeah..." Holster said breathlessly, his senses slowly returning. "Yeah, fuck, yeah..." He returned his hand to its previous position, wrapped around both of them. Ransom moaned and bent down again, kissing him passionately, not letting up to give Holster another chance to speak.

They were both close but Ransom came first. Holster finished soon after, the sensation of Ransom's cum hitting his skin too much to bear. Ransom climbed off of him and grabbed some kleenex from the desk, wiping Holster's abs clean as best he could. He let out a breathy chuckle and collapsed back onto the bed, next to his roommate. "Wow. Shit, man..."

"Yeah," Holster panted to catch his breath, trying to look casual despite inwardly freaking out that not only had they made out during, but Ransom had returned to his bed after rather than climbing up to the top bunk to sleep. He pulled his boxers back up.

Their silence was soon punctuated by more muffled moans from the floor below with Jack repeatedly calling Bitty by his first name. Ransom was the first to speak up. "Hey, do you think...?"

"That Bitty's fucking Jack?"

"Yeah."

"Sounds like it."

They chuckled quietly, trying their best to break the awkward tension. "So, Bits and Jack, huh? I'm still a little bit shocked..."

"Me too, though _this_ is certainly driving home the point that they're actually dating."

"I never even thought Jack was into dudes. If only I had known sooner..." Ransom let out an exhausted sigh.

Holster winced. He knew it. Ransom and Jack had always had a special bond, both being from Canada. He could not count how many times the two had shared conversations about topics that Holster could not participate in. "You have a thing for Jack?"

"What? No! I meant for Bits. We could've set them up a long time ago if I knew it was even an option," he stifled a yawn. "They got so close last year, it would've been an obvious move."

"Not as close as us," Holster said without thinking. "Uh, well-"

"That's true... Wait. Did you _seriously_ think I liked Jack?" Ransom laughed. "Come on, bro..."

"I don't know," Holster yawned. "What time is it?"

"I think around 3:30am? Hey, should I stomp my foot or something so they know we can hear everything they're doing?"

"No, don't. They'll know we've been listening this whole time. I'll put on some music or something. Hang on," Holster sat up and groped blindly in the dark for his cell phone. "Are you on top of it?"

Ransom twisted his body and reached back between his shoulders. Shit, sorry man. Here," he held it out to his friend, but Holster leaned in and kissed him as he took the phone from his hand. He laughed. "What was that for?"

"Oh, uh, I just felt like it. Sorry..."

"It's okay."

They heard Bitty moan particularly loud and both men grew flustered. "Okay. Music. Now. Got it," Holster scrambled to open a random music station, and a Taylor Swift song started playing. "There," he sighed with relief and eased back into bed. "Sorry for kissing you like that."

"I already said it was okay. You're a good kisser, bro."

"Really? It's been a while..."

"Why haven't you had a girlfriend lately? Didn't want one? You know I'll give you space if you bring a girl home. Just put a jockstrap on the doorknob and I'll steer clear."

"I don't want one."

Ransom rolled over onto his stomach and propped himself up on his elbows. Bitty and Jack's moans were mostly covered by the music, but a few sounds still snuck through. "They're really going at it. I can still hear them."

"Yeah, me too."

"Hey, have you ever done it?"

"Done what?" Holster turned his head and noticed just how close Ransom was to him.

"Had sex with a guy."

Holster felt his cheeks heat up as he blushed. "Uh, well, not quite..." Ransom grinned and cocked his head to the side, prompting Holster to continue. He sighed. "When I was 17 or 18, this guy and I tried once but neither of us really knew what we were doing..."

"So did you or not?"

"It was a failed attempt. I kinda freaked out and we stopped."

"And that was that? End of story?"

"Well, we didn't really know each other that well, and I didn't trust him after that even if he _had_  wanted to try again."

"What does that mean?" Ransom's brow furrowed. "You didn't trust him 'after that.' What did he do?" 

"Nothing, really. He just got a little aggressive, so I knocked out one of his teeth and took off," Holster chewed his bottom lip. "Hey, um, don't repeat that to anybody, okay? I've never told anyone else before."

"Of course, bro. Shit. I'm so sorry."

"It's okay. Like I said, he didn't really end up doing anything. It just freaked me out and I took off," he shrugged his shoulders. "I guess it kinda scared me away from trying again with another guy."

Ransom nudged him softly in the arm. "You could've told me you liked guys too. This is _Samwell_."

"I know, but I didn't want anyone trying to set me up with guys after that and I was fine with girls, so..."

"Huh. So you're actually kinda into it when we do stuff like this? It's not just a convenience thing. You really like kissing me?"

Of course Holster liked kissing him. Did Ransom think he was just a convenient placeholder? "Yeah. Sorry, I won't do it again if it makes you uncomfortable."

"Adam."

Holster's breath caught in his throat. "Yeah?"

"Are _you_ uncomfortable? I know we've been fooling around like this for a while, but I didn't know about what happened before. If you're feeling pressured or-"

"No!" Holster insisted and grabbed Ransom's arm. "It's okay with _you_ , promise. I like... I want to. Do you want to stop this?"

Ransom shook his head. "No. Actually, I have an idea..." The corner of his mouth twitched when Holster's eyes widened. "You trust _me_ , right?"

"Of course," Holster's usually loud voice squeaked out.

"So let me help you. It will be like therapy sort of. I'll help you get more comfortable and then if you meet a guy you like and trust then you don't have to be so worried. If it ends up being a chick then so be it, but this way you can keep guys as an option too. Take advantage of the time you have at Samwell, dude. Hey, is there anyone you like already?"

 _You_. Holster thought as he looked up at Ransom's brown eyes in the dark. "No."

"So do you want to try it out? You're always helping me out with everything, let me return the favour."

"How far are you willing to go?"

"Whatever it takes. Uh- but- like, slowly. I can't do a zero-to-sixty thing if you suddenly want to go all the way or something. Neither of us are dating anyone right now so let's just take time and work through it," Ransom leaned in closer, lips hovering an inch away. "Can I kiss you?"

"Yeah," Holster closed his eyes as their lips connected in a gentle kiss. When he reopened his eyes, Ransom was smiling. "You're okay with this? For sure?"

"Yeah," Ransom chuckled. "I like kissing you, bro."

"And you're not going to date anybody while we try this? What about March?"

"She's history. That's long over, don't worry. I won't date anybody else, I promise."

Holster let out a deep breath, only then realizing that he had been holding it for the past twenty seconds. He was setting himself up for heartbreak, he knew that, but part of him wanted to enjoy every second he could get with Ransom like this. When it was over, they would both move on to other partners and return to being strictly best friends. Was it wrong to make use of the opportunity that had presented itself so neatly? Ransom was practically wrapping himself with a ribbon. He would not be making the offer if he was not okay with it, right?

"Okay. I'm in if you are," Holster said with a nervous smile. "You're _absolutely_ sure you're okay with this? Tell me as soon as you want to stop. If it ever gets to be too much. Promise me you'll kick my ass if I try something you're not ready for, okay?"

"Bro, relax. I trust you too, you know? I know you're not going to do anything I can't handle."

Holster moved to kiss him, but paused. "So, can I kiss you right now?"

"Starting now, if we're alone, you don't have to ask me. Okay? And if we're off campus and you want to try something like holding hands or whatever, just let me know. Anything that you've wanted to try but have been too scared to, I've got your back. Come here," Ransom nuzzled their noses together, lips lightly brushing against one another until they met with a kiss. 

 _I love you._ That was what he wanted to say, but neither man spoke again. Instead they drifted off to sleep in Holster's bed until the alarm went off 45 minutes later.

******

Holster woke up to find Ransom still in his bed, one arm draped across the blond man's bare abdomen. It took a couple minutes for him to realize that their conversation an hour earlier was in fact, not something he had dreamt about. "Rans. Wake up. Those Black Friday deals aren't gonna buy themselves..." He tapped the other man's shoulder with one hand while the other hit the snooze alarm on his phone.

"Ughn..." Ransom groaned and pulled himself closer, moving his head from the pillow onto Holster's shoulder. "I don't want to wake up yet..." 

" _Rans..._ "

"If I kiss you, will you let me stay in bed for ten more minutes?"

Holster nodded his head against the pillow. "Yeah. Okay, deal."

Ransom laughed. He had been joking, but if Holster wanted to, he was not about to object. "Deal," he whispered and shifted his body up to kiss Holster, still in disbelief that this was really happening. "Better?"

"Almost," Holster's hands slid around the sides of Ransom's ribcage to his back. They kissed lazily, half-asleep until the snooze alarm went off ten minutes later. "Shit."

Ransom sighed and reluctantly climbed out of bed. "Okay. Time to stand in line for an hour for a new TV."

"Give me 5 minutes to hop in the shower quick and we can head out."

"Want me to join you, bro? Can't let Jack and Bits have all the fun, right?" Ransom winked.

"Oh- uh, no. Maybe next time? Okay I'll be right back," Holster gathered a change of clothes and hurried downstairs to the second floor.

Ransom stretched and got dressed. He looked over at the rumpled sheets on Holster's bed. Had he pushed things too far, already? Holster had left the room in a hurry after he had joked about the shower. This was a terrible idea, one he had no right suggesting in the first place. He had to be careful about how he handled the situation, one wrong move could potentially ruin their friendship. If Holster found out how he really felt, well...

Ransom was just finishing making Holster's bed when the taller man returned to the attic. "Oh, you didn't have to do that," Holster said with an awkward smile, suddenly remembering the sight of his best friend straddled over his hips in vivid detail. "Um..."

"It's okay. Hey, Holtzy?"

"Hm?"

"I was just joking about the shower thing, you know. Didn't mean to make things weird," Ransom said, rubbing the back of his neck. "If it's ever too much, tell me okay?"

So the shower had not been a serious offer? Holster had almost said yes, but now he was relieved that he had declined in order to save time before they left for the store. Not that it mattered if they were the first people through the doors, anyway. Both men were athletes in peak physical shape, surely they could outrun the other shoppers, and they would have to be truly crazy to try picking a fight with either one of them. "Okay, dude. Yeah. For sure. We uh, we should head out. Ready?"

"Yeah, let's go."

******

A week passed and Winter Screw was fast-approaching. A night that both Ransom and Holster typically looked forward to, but this year was different. They would not be finding dates for each other like in previous years. They could not even offer a good explanation as to why they were not taking dates this year. Luckily, the Samwell men's hockey team seemed blissfully distracted this year, and nobody dwelled on the anomaly much longer than a question or two.

"So do you and Rans have your dates set up for Winter Screw yet?" Nursey asked. He had cornered Holster in the quad on his way back from class the following Friday.

"Huh? Oh, uh, no. We're doing the stag thing this year..."

"Really? But I thought you guys were like the kings of Winter Screw. You find everyone dates."

"Yeah, I know. We're still setting people up, just uh, not each other," Holster shuffled his feet through the freshly fallen snow. "Going to enjoy my senior year girlfriend-free."

"That's chill, man. Is Rans still with that March girl? The one from Farmer's team?"

"No," Holster answered a little too quickly. "No, uh, I think they're done now. Why do you ask?"

"Just curious..." Nursey ran his hand across the back of a bench as they passed by, knocking the thin layer of snow to the ground. "So... Can you guys find me a date for Screw this year?"

"Sure, bro. Anyone you have in mind?" Holster asked, not realizing that was a loaded question. 

Nursey had only one person on his mind, which was why he wanted to be set up on a date with someone else in the first place. "No. I just... I need a date. Set me up with anyone, I don't care."

"Okay, but, what's your type? You usually turn everyone who asks you out down. I kinda thought you were holding out for D-!"

"I said anyone. _Literally_ anyone, okay?" Nursey cut him off. "I've gotta go, man. See ya later," the younger man jogged off in a hurry before Holster could ask any follow-up questions.

It was for the best, Holster thought at the time. He could get more answers from the young defenseman later through text messages, and this way he did not have to risk being asked any more questions about his own Winter Screw plans, or lack thereof. 

Their biggest break came on Sunday a couple days later, when Bitty knocked on the door of the attic, seeking dating advice for a friend. After scolding them for their initial chirps about his sex life with Jack, Bitty had explained that he needed help finding a date for his barely-out friend, who he refused to name.

"Me?!" Bitty laughed. "You guys think I should be his date?"

"Yeah, bro. You're obviously worried about him and he doesn't sound ready to be out out at all. Give him a nice safe experience for his first ever date with a guy. You know, someone he trusts," the co-captains briefly made eye contact before Holster cleared his throat and continued. "Help him get comfortable being seen with a guy at least."

"Yeah, but also Bits, you won't even tell us his name. If he's still that closeted, is he going to be okay with being seen on a Screw date with a guy in the first place?"

"I don't know," Bitty sighed with a shake of his head. "I'm so worried, I don't know what to do. He said out loud that he was gay today and then nearly had a panic attack. I want him to know he can rely on me for support, and it's not my place to tell him he's not ready... But I really don't think he's ready. Being seen with me at an event that clearly make people think we're on a date might be too much for him, even though we're only friends," Bitty sighed again. "And he said I could tell you guys his name, but I really want to double-check with him first."

"Wait, this is someone we know?"

"Yeah."

"From the team?"

"Yeah."

Ransom clapped his hands together once. "Okay, new plan. Sorta. Group date, all four of us wear matching hats or whatever for the meet-up, and if anyone asks we can say we're all going stag and he can stay as closeted as he wants right now."

"Genius, bro!" Holster gave his shoulder a shake. It would give them a reason to not have their own dates as well, along with Bitty who was keeping his relationship with Jack a secret. It was a win-win-win situation.

"Great! But- you guys don't have dates already?"

"Nah, but it's okay. This works. And besides, as captains, it's better to show support for our teammates, right?"

"It's what Jack would've done," Holster barely got the words out before all three of them collapsed into cackling laughter, imagining Jack Zimmermann taking an insecure frog to Winter Screw. "Well, I guess he would've done it for _you_ , Bits. Too bad we didn't know sooner."

"It's fine. It worked out alright in the end. Actually, he did walk me home after my first Screw, so I can't say that night ended _all_ that badly..."

Holster laughed loudly. "Hah! Jack was trying to wheel Bitty back then and nobody knew! Not even them!"

"Oh, hush!" Bitty stood. "That's enough out of you for one night, Mr. Birkholtz..." He paused at the attic door. "Thanks for all your help, guys. It means a lot. I'll check with my friend again and let you if he still says it's okay to tell you his name. I'm heading to bed, see you tomorrow, boys."

Holster waited until they heard Bitty's footfalls down the stairs. "He says he's going to bed, but I bet he's totally going to jack it on skype with Zimmermann..."

"Gross, dude. Come on..." Ransom laughed and reclined on the bed. "This is gonna work though, right? It's a perfect cover for why we're not setting each other up with chicks this year. Or- unless you still _wanted_  to... I guess I should've asked you first."

"What? No. I thought we weren't doing that while we... do _this_ , you know?"

"Okay good. We're on the same page, then."

Holster lied down next to Ransom. "Who do you think Bitty's mystery friend is? A taddy, maybe?"

"Must be. He said it was someone on the team," Ransom shrugged. "I guess we'll find out at Screw, whether Bits tells us beforehand or not. If we're tagging along as a group to cover their platonic date..."

"It can kind of be like we're on our own date that night..." Holster wondered out loud. "I mean-"

Ransom chuckled. "Yeah, bro. Totally."

Holster turned onto his side, his eyes sliding closed, their lips barely brushing. He wished this could be real. A normal thing they could do, like an actual couple. A week had passed and already they had fallen into a pleasantly comfortable routine. Ransom slept in his bed every night, he did not even need to ask. The other man hooked his leg over Holster's hip, and he surged his face forward to close that final small distance between them with a kiss. "Mm..." Holster moaned into the kiss.

"What do you want to do tonight?"

"Just this," Holster replied, his hands sliding under Ransom's shirt, forcing it to ride up as he felt along the hard ripple of the other man's abs up to his chest. Ransom bucked his hips against Holster, already hard. "Fuck, you're so hot..."

Ransom grinned and nipped his lip. "You sure you're okay with just this?"

"Ugh, shit. No. Maybe not," Holster groaned when Ransom reached down and undid the drawstring of his sweatpants. " _Fuck!_ Definitely not!"

Ransom chuckled against Holster's collarbone as he reached inside, taking him with a firm yet gentle grip. "Good?"

"Uh-huh!" Holster choked out, unable to think of real words at the moment. "Ah, fuck! Mm!" He kissed his way down from Ransom's temple to his mouth.

"Want me to stop, bro?" Ransom chirped as the taller man's fingers clawed desperately at his back.

"No," Holster whispered as they kissed again. He gasped when Ransom pulled his pants down to his knees, and then proceeded to move his leg so that he could tug down his own pants. The two men kicked their clothing off the bed. "Your shirt..."

"Yours too," Ransom kissed him again as soon as their t-shirts had cleared over their heads. "Ah!" He moaned when Holster gripped his hips, grinding their bodies together. "Fuck, Adam..."

"I'm close," Holster's breath was ragged and he squirmed in Ransom's hand. "Fuck!" He grabbed his discarded t-shirt from the corner of the bed and shoved it between their abdomens just in time as he came, sparing the mess on his sheets and Ransom's body.

"Better not let Bitty grab that the next time he gets the urge to do everyone's laundry..." Ransom chuckled, his fingers tracing down the vertebrae of Holster's sweat-slicked back.

"I'll wash it tomorrow," Holster assured him with a small chuckle as he caught his breath. He could feel Ransom was still hard, pressed against his hip, but not asking him to take care of it. "Rans?"

"Yeah?"

"I want to..." He was nervous to ask, this was a step they had never taken before. Then again, they had never been completely naked in bed together either, and yet that had been due to Ransom's initiative. "Can I suck your dick?"

Ransom's body tensed up. "Are you sure?"

 "Yeah," Holster kissed down Ransom's neck, stopping to flick his tongue against his nipple. Ransom squirmed beneath him. "So can I?"

"Yeah, but... Stop as soon as you want to, okay?"

"I know," Holster grabbed a condom from the nightstand, carefully rolling it on with his mouth.

Ransom writhed, trying to stay still but failing miserably and he stared up at the underside of his bed, the top bunk he had not slept in once during the past week. " _Fuck._ Oh god..."

Holster stopped for a moment, placing kisses to Ransom's inner thigh, lightly nipping at the skin near his hip bone. "Good?" He asked.

"Yeah. _Ugh!_ " Ransom moaned as Holster's mouth closed in around him once more, his large hands pressing down on the shorter man's hips to steady him. Ransom gripped at the sheets with one hand, while the other moved down to rake through Holster's hair. It was not until he felt short hair slipping through his fingertips that it fully hit him that this was Holster and not a woman. "Shit, you're really good at this..."

"It's been a while, but it's like riding a bicycle, I guess..." Holster chuckled before continuing. He had not expected Ransom to be this into it, but it was hard keeping him still.

Ransom laughed, but it soon morphed into another moan. The sight of Holster's short blond hair as his head bobbed deftly between Ransom's legs was about to push him over the edge. "Word of warning... for next time... I don't really know- Ah! Know... what I'm doing, so... I'm probably gonna be way worse at it than you..." He managed to say between gasps of breath. Holster doubled his efforts, and Ransom could not hold back any longer. "Ah! Fuck, Adam!"

Holster slowed his pace again, working Ransom through it before finally sitting back and carefully removing the condom, tossing it in the trash can. He placed languid kisses back up the length of Ransom's body, unsure if he had heard correctly. "Next time...?"

"Yeah... Apologies in advance if I'm awful...  I'll try, but that... Fuck, that was so hot..." He kissed Holster, breathing against his lips. "Okay, you definitely don't need to worry about giving good head. _Holy shit._.."

"You want to try next time...?" He had not imagined it. That really was what Ransom was saying. Holster was not sure he could handle this. He was in so deep.

"Yeah, if you're cool with it."

"Yeah, but- You don't have to..."

"Bro, I _want_ to," Ransom chuckled and kissed him again. "Cool?"

"Yeah," Holster rolled over onto his back and closed his eyes, pretending that what Ransom was telling him was no big deal. Pretending that they're weren't naked in bed together post-orgasm. Pretending that it would be easy to go back to just friends when all this was over, like he was not hopelessly in love with the man beside him. "Cool..."


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I forgot to mention this last time, but the title of this fic comes from the Ellie Goulding song "Don't Need Nobody".  
> You might want to listen to it lol. It's hard to find a non-live version on YouTube, but there's a cool acoustic cover with guitar by a guy named Jonathan Jones Hewlett on there that I have listened to more than a dozen times lol  
> The song they dance to with Bitty and Dex in the beginning of the chapter is "Lose Control" by Hedley.  
> Ransom's sisters names were pulled from Twitter where Ngozi listed their hypothetical names. As far as I can tell, "Ife" is pronounced "ee-feh" someone please correct me if I'm wrong.

**December 12th, 2015: Haus Party**

Ransom flinched when he watched Holster dancing so closely with Bitty. Most of the hockey team and a dozen or so other students had gathered at the Haus to watch the Falconers play the Aces in Las Vegas, and the game had been followed by a party.

He knew there was nothing to be worried about between Bitty and Holster, even when their younger teammate leapt into Holster's arms and his legs wrapped tightly around the taller blond's waist. They were just friends. Besides, Bitty was hopelessly in love with Jack, and Holster... Well, it did not matter because they were just friends.

Still, part of Ransom hated the sight of Holster's large hands touching anyone but him. He joined in, sandwiching Bitty between them, all laughing at the small blond's surprised yelp.

Holster grinned over Bitty's shoulder at him, his hand sliding from behind the youngest man's back to grip Ransom's bicep, pulling him in a little tighter. Kidding around like this at parties was one of the only times they could touch each other in more-than-bromantic ways in public, at least on campus.

"You better not drop me, now!" Bitty laughed and clung a little tighter to Holster's neck when the hand that had been supporting his back slipped away.

Holster leaned into Bitty's ear. "I don't think that's possible -- your legs have quite the grip on me. Getting in some practice for Jack?"

Bitty threw his head back with laughter and Holster winked at Ransom. "Oh lord! No comment!!"

"Think that means yes," Ransom laughed.

"Definitely a yes," Holster grinned at Bitty.

"Y'all put me down. I'm going to dance with Dex. _He_ won't chirp me about the intimate details of my sex life..." Bitty laughed and hopped down out of Holster's arms, dragging the red-haired defenseman onto the floor to dance with them instead being a wallflower.

Ransom leaned in close to Holster's ear, so that he could hear his whisper over the music. "Bro, we should 'Roxbury' him."

"Oh, bro, totally!"

They stepped in close on either side of Dex, bouncing him around uncontrollably back and forth until he was laughing and had loosened up enough that he no longer minded dancing with much-gentler Bitty. They had only found out a couple days prior that Dex was in fact the gay friend that Bitty had been so worried about. The co-captains had taken it upon themselves to help out any way they could while Dex started the awkward coming out process, and figured that making it seem publicly like dancing with Bitty was the safer, rational dance floor option was a part of that process.

After a few more songs of dancing and trying not to touch each other too much, Holster realized that Dex was gone and Bitty had stepped off to the side, texting someone eagerly on his phone, likely Jack. "Am I dancing by myself now?" Ransom's voice got Holster's attention, but not as much as his fingers hooking the belt loops of his jeans to pull him close. Ransom was pretty drunk, he would never be so bold in public under normal circumstances.

Ransom kissed his neck right there in the middle of the dance floor and Holster nearly stopped breathing. He looked around in a panic, but it appeared that none of their teammates had noticed. This could be bad, they might regret it later, but Holster was pretty drunk himself and at the moment there was nothing else he wanted to do more. He turned Ransom's head, kissing him on the lips, and was met with eager reciprocation. "Shit..." He gasped as they broke apart.

"Wait a minute, then meet me upstairs," Ransom whispered and headed into the hallway. He was stopped as he reached the bottom of the staircase.

"So _that's_ why you've stopped calling March, huh?" April grabbed his arm. "She was really hurt, you know."

"I'm sorry, I-"

"You should be telling _her_  that. Not me," April nodded with her head towards the blonde woman talking to Chowder and Farmer a few feet away. She caught March's attention and waved her over, and the tall woman reluctantly approached. "So, tell her."

"I'm sorry I haven't called..." Ransom said sheepishly.

"It's fine, I guess... But I thought things were going good. I didn't expect you to ghost me like that..."

Shit. Ransom really did not want to be having this conversation right now, especially with Holster sure to round the corner any minute. "I'm sorry. It's just..."

"Is there someone else?"

"...Yeah."

"Fuck, dude. Do you need me to do it for you? He's been banging his roommate. I just saw them making out on the dance floor two minutes ago," April sighed. 

Holster arrived at that moment, and was a little surprised to see Ransom still at the bottom of the stairs, but more surprised by the company he was with. Ransom looked uncomfortable. That was not a good sign. "Hey, what's going on here?" He intervened.

"Nothing, bro. It's all good. You heading upstairs?" Ransom stepped aside to clear a path up the staircase. 

Holster frowned, something was definitely not right. "What's wrong?"

"Just drop this weird act, okay? I saw you guys kiss just now. It's obvious that you're screwing each other. At least be man enough to admit that you're the reason why he dropped March without a second thought," April scowled at him while the other two were distracted by a private conversation. 

Holster paled. "It's not like that..."

" _Really_ , because that's what it looks like. And if it _looks_ like a duck, and _swims_ like duck..." She trailed off with the idiom, her point made. April sighed. "Listen, it's fine if you guys are gay together now or whatever, but he should've told her. We're all used to it, this is _Samwell_ , but be honest at least. It wasn't fair to her at all. While you guys have been having your fun, I've spent the past two months picking up the pieces of her broken fucking heart."

"I didn't know..."

"Well, now you do. So forgive me if I continue to think your boyfriend is a douchebag for what he did."

"I told you, it's not like that."

Nursey stormed past them in the hall, heading for the front door already wearing his coat, and accidentally bumped March with his shoulder. She toppled forward and Ransom steadied her. They shared a nervous laugh, and Holster could not stop the wrenching feeling in his gut. They looked good together, and things had been going well between them throughout the summer, until Ransom has suddenly started distancing himself. If Holster remembered correctly, he had even visited March for a weekend in late June. He still did not know what had changed Ransom's mind about her.

Holster worried briefly that it was all his fault. What was it that April said? The past two months? That was definitely before they had started fooling around again. A small wave of relief washed over Holster -- at least it was not his arrangement with Ransom that had caused him to pull away from the pretty blonde.

April studied the concerned look on Holster's face. "Yeah, _totally_  not like that. Come on, March. Let's go."

"Okay. See you around Justin," March leaned in and kissed his cheek. "Adam."

The two women left and Ransom immediately looked over at his best friend. "I don't know why she did that, bro."

"Whatever," Holster trudged up the stairs with Ransom following behind him. He locked the door behind them. "Do you think they'll say anything?"

"There's nothing to say. We got drunk and kissed, that's all they know," Ransom shrugged. The atmosphere in the attic was an uneasy one. "I explained everything to March."

"Then... Do you mind explaining it to _me?"_  

"What do you-?"

Holster took a seat on his bed. "Do you want to end this? What we've been doing? If you still like her..."

"Who said I still like her? No," Ransom shook his head. "Did April say something to you?"

"She didn't have to..."

The shorter man sat down next to him. "It's over with her, don't worry."

"I'm not worried," Holster scoffed, but it was an obvious lie. "But... April _did_  say that you sort of dropped March like a sack of potatoes. When you told me at thanksgiving that things were over, I didn't realize that you had just stopped calling. How long were you dating her? Like eight months? You should've at least broken up with her properly."

"There was no break-up to be had. We were never actually dating, just hooking up."

"When it lasts for eight months and you meet her family over the summer it's no longer 'hooking up.' Come on, bro... What happened?"

Ransom sighed. He did not dare correct him that it had been closer to the ten month mark, nor did he dare tell Holster the real reason he had changed his mind about March. "I apologized to her tonight. I think she understands. If it really bothers you I can meet with her again and really get into it so that I know she's on the same page... But I don't want to tell you."

"You don't want to tell me why you ended it with her? Why the hell not?"

"I just don't, okay?"

"But we tell each other _everything_..."

"Well, not this."

"But-"

"Drop it, Adam. I mean it," Ransom huffed. He stood and walked over to the desk, grabbing his biochemistry textbook and tossing it onto his top bunk. He climbed up after it. "I'm gonna study for a bit."

"But you're _drunk_. Rans, what the fuck?"

"I can still study. It's fine. Go back downstairs. Someone should keep an eye on the party."

Holster scoffed. It had been Ransom's idea to sneak up there together in the first place, what was he saying now? "Whatever, man."

"I have enough shit to deal with right now without you purposely adding to it, okay? We'll talk later."

"Fine," Holster left, slamming the attic door behind him. 

Ransom sighed heavily and rested his forehead against his textbook. He had opened it to a random page, with no real intention to study. "Shit..." He was still too rattled by his earlier encounter with the girls and he had taken it out on Holster instead. An apology was definitely in order, but Ransom did not know how he would be able to dodge talking about March.

Things had been good with her, it was true. She was nice. She was pretty. They had a lot of fun together... But as the summer drew to a close, Ransom found himself texting her less and less, and Holster more and more. When he thought about returning to Samwell for senior year, Holster was the only one he really looked forward to seeing. When March had casually mentioned meeting _his_ family "next time" in reference to his June visit, Ransom had balked at the idea. No. What would his family think? _Holster_ was the only person he ever brought home with him from Samwell. His parents referred to his two sisters as "the girls" and he and Holster as "the boys" when speaking to other family and friends, as though the large blond was already a son to them. The thought of March one day replacing Holster at the dinner table during holidays with his family had horrified him. 

That was when he knew -- he wanted to be with Holster. Nobody else. He loved him.

It was wrong of Ransom to blow off March like he did, he knew that now, but it had not occurred to him at the time that it would bother her so much. He hoped that their brief conversation earlier at least helped her get closure. Ransom had admitted to her that there was someone else, and that someone else was in fact, Holster. March seemed to understand after that, though he did not blame her friend April for continuing to be angry with him.

Now, he only hoped that he had not completely ruined things with Holster. They almost never fought, but Ransom had panicked when his best friend had asked about why things had ended with March. Ransom could not possibly tell him how he felt right now. 

When he had initially proposed their current arrangement to Holster, Ransom had made a point of asking if the blond currently liked any men, and he had said no. The small window that had opened upon learning that Holster was also attracted to men had immediately slammed shut. At the moment, this arrangement was all he had, clinging to the hope that he could somehow change Holster's mind and make him see how good they were together.

******

** December 30th, 2015: Toronto, ON **

"Where's Adam?" Ransom's older sister, Ife, turned around when he entered the kitchen of his family home.

"Hm? Asleep already, I think. He ate too much at dinner."

She tossed him a dish towel and turned back to the sink full of dishes. "Dry for me, okay?"

"I just came for a glass of water!" He protested, but picked up a clean plate and started drying dishes like she asked.

"So... You guys are heading out tomorrow, right? Is this finally going to be the time?"

"The time for what?"

Ife scoffed a laugh. "Come on! You've brought him home for Christmas for the past three years. I'm not stupid, you know? Neither are mom and dad. Why don't you just come out with it already? Everybody loves him, it's not a problem."

"What?"

"At least then you could get rid of that dumb air matress that takes up the entire floor of your bedroom that we all know is not being slept in. I'm seriously worried that one of you will trip on that thing and crack your head open one of these days."

"Wait- _what?_ "

"Justin. It's cool. You've been dating him for how long? At least over two years," she shrugged her shoulders. "Are you seriously pretending to sleep in separate beds still?"

Ransom felt as though he had been punched in the gut. "We're not..."

"Sleeping in the same bed? Give me a break."

"Dating. We're not dating."

Ife let out a small laugh and shook her head. "Justin, it's okay. Really. Would it make you feel better to hear from mom and dad directly? We all love Adam. He's been part of the family for a long time."

"I'm serious. We're _really_ not dating. I was sort of seeing a girl at school for most of last year. Remember? I visited her in the summer..."

"But..." She looked truly shocked. "I don't understand. If he's not your boyfriend, then what is he to you?"

"We're just friends..."

"And you're okay with that?" She asked. Ransom turned away and busied himself with putting away some of the dried dishes. "Justin."

" _Of course_ I'm not okay with that," he sighed. "But he doesn't think of me that way, so..."

"Are you sure about that?"

"Positive."

"But how do you-"

"Because I asked him. Okay?" He kept his head down as he continued drying dishes. "Hurry up and keep washing. I don't want to be here all night..."

Ife returned to washing the dishes, and the room was quiet for a couple minutes. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No."

"But-"

"I said I don't want to talk about it. There's nothing to-" Ransom turned his head when he noticed his older sister had stopped with only a few dishes left to wash. "Wait. Are you crying?"

"It feels like you're breaking up or something..."

"Well, we're not. We've never dated. You don't need to cry..."

"Sorry," Ife sniffled as she wiped her eyes with the back of her arm. "What are you going to do?"

"I don't know... Cling to some shred of hope that he might change his mind, I guess," Ransom sighed. "But honestly, I don't have any idea what would happen after graduation anyway. We don't even live in the same country. Our friendship might even fade if we're not together every day like now."

"But he's close at least. You could still see each other on weekends," his sister offered hopefully.

"Maybe," Ransom said with another sad sigh. "Can we talk about something else, please? I can't do this right now."

"There's not much left to do. Why don't you head to bed? I can finish up here."

"Are you sure?"

"I insist," Ife shook the water from her hands and dried them on a dish towel before pulling her little brother in for a hug. Her hands were still hot from the dish water, and they felt comforting on his back. "It will all work out somehow. I'm sure of it."

"Thanks," Ransom gave her a small squeeze and smiled as he left. His smile faded as he got closer to his room. The fact that his family was so supportive of the relationship that he did not _actually_ have with his attractive best friend made it all worse. He had been worried about what they would think if he ever came out, and meanwhile they had collectively assumed he was dating Holster all along. His big sister _cried_ when she found out they were not actually a couple. Ransom felt like crying a little at the moment too.

Ransom closed the bedroom door behind him and stepped carfully over the air mattress, sitting on the edge of his childhood bed where Holster was currently sleeping. He sighed and hung his head in his hands. Now on top of everything else, he had to worry about disappointing his family.

"Hey..." Holster stirred. He shifted back against the wall to make room for Ransom. "Where were you?"

"Damn it. My glass of water!" Ransom groaned. "I went to get some water and my sister roped me into drying the dishes."

"Which sister?"

"Ife."

Holster laughed. "Hah! Yes! It is the oldest child's birthright to boss their younger siblings around. I drag my sisters into all kinds of shit I don't want to do."

"You're horrible," Ransom chuckled quietly. "Why did you even need to ask which sister, then? Obviously it was Ife."

"Hey now, Dami has that big project to write..."

"Please. Only because she's wasted all break long and now has to cram everything in last minute. I swear to god, she's a worse procrastinator than Bitty. She is in for a rude awakening when she gets to university."

"She has four days left, that's plenty of time."

"Yeah, but she conveniently only needs to study whenever there are chores to do," Ransom grinned. 

Holster reached one arm out and wrapped it around the other man's waist. "Lie down for a bit."

"I thought we agreed not to do anything in my parents' house," Ransom said. Although that agreement had been made back when he was worried about being caught. Now that he knew his family thought they were in a relationship, and he had told Ife that they were not, it would raise even more questions if someone were to see them in a compromising position.

"We won't do anything. You can go back to the air mattress in a few minutes, it just feels weird sleeping in different beds again..."

Holster won him over rather easily. The relationship between them had been strained since the Haus party -- not in an especially obvious way -- but still, both men felt it. That night had been the first reality check that neither of them had wanted. Until then, it had been easy to pretend like boyfriends behind closed doors, but kissing in the middle of the party and being confronted by April and March had brought home the fact that they really could not explain what they were doing to anyone else. They barely understood it themselves. 

Since then, little cracks had appeared. Ransom had slept in the top bunk that night. Holster had sat between Bitty and Nursey at team breakfast two days later. Things had returned more or less to normal after that, but as exam stress built, Ransom spent more time in his own bunk. The impending arrival of winter break had relaxed them again, and the three days apart while Holster was in Buffalo had been hard. They were happy to reunite in Toronto for the past week, but it had not left them much privacy. 

Holster sighed happily when he finally had Ransom's broad back pressed against his chest. Did he dare tell him how much he had missed this? No. It would surely scare Ransom away. Instead Holster held him a little tighter, and allowed himself to enjoy the moment while it lasted. Moments like this almost felt real. If he closed his eyes, Holster could imagine that this was perfectly normal. Like he was visiting his in-laws for the holidays and it was not a problem if someone spotted them sleeping in the same bed. He gently kissed the spot behind Ransom's ear.

"Bro..."

"Sorry. I won't do anything else."

"It's okay. I've actually kinda missed this," Ransom admitted.

"Me too," Holster smiled, even though Ransom could not see. "Hey, do you think your mom will send us off with some of those little deep fried things tomorrow?"

Ransom chuckled. "You need to be way more specific than that, dude."

"Ankara?"

"That's the capital of Turkey, so my guess is no," he chirped.

"Shut up, you totally know what I mean. What are they called?"

"Akara."

Holster scoffed. "I was so close. Give me points for trying, I'm half asleep."

"Fine. You're awarded 10 arbitrary points."

"Damn right, I am!" The blond whispered excitedly and both men descended into quiet fits of giggles. "But seriously, bro. Could you ask her to make them?"

"She would make them if _you_  asked her, maybe."

"I can't ask her to do that. That's the kind of selfish request that only her beautiful baby boy could get away with."

Ransom shook his head against the pillow. "No way. Besides, she already made some. There are currently two ziplocked bags with our names on them in the fridge."

Holster chuckled and squeezed his arm around Ransom again. "No way! Ugh, your mom's the best! I love your family."

"Yeah, they love you too," Ransom whispered. They stayed curled up together for a few minutes longer, with Ransom absentmindedly rubbing his hand along Holster's forearm. "Hey... Could you be quiet?"

"I didn't even say anything!"

"No, I mean..." Ransom twisted in Holster's arms, turning around to face him. "Can you be _quiet?_ " His hand slid down the blond man's abdomen, sliding underneath his pants but still over his boxers.

"Oh. How did you-"

"Well, you were spooning me, so yeah. I felt it," he whispered.

Holster hesitated, grabbing Ransom by the wrist and removing his hand. "Sorry. I wasn't trying to start anything, really. You don't have to, I can take care of it."

"You can't keep quiet, can you?"

"Shh! Of course I can!" Holster's insistence made Ransom snicker. Even his whispers were somehow loud.

Ransom slid off the bed, kneeling on the air mattress, and tugged Holster's hips to follow along. "Remember I might be bad at this..."

Holster's blue eyes went wide as he moved to the edge of the bed, Ransom taking position between his knees. Was this really happening? They had experimented a little more with their hands and fingers over the past two weeks, when together, but Ransom had not followed through on his 'next time' suggestion from the first time Holster had given him a blow job -- until now. Ransom was tugging at the waist of his pants and Holster helped them off of his hips. Ransom pulled them down to his ankles and ran his hands up the blond man's bare thighs. This was really happening. "Shit. Wait. Go in my bag, that little inner pocket..."

Ransom did as instructed and pulled out a condom. "You've got quite a few in here..." He grinned.

"Uh, I really wasn't expecting anything, but I thought just in case something did happen... To minimize any mess..." Holster was blushing. When was the last time he was this nervous about getting a blowjob? Not since he was a teenager, at least. Despite Ransom's warnings, Holster was not worried one bit about him being bad at this. "On second thought, I don't think I can keep quiet," he whispered.

"Should I gag you? Bro, I can't just, like, leave you hanging like _that_ ," Ransom tried not to stare at the impressive tent in Holster's boxers. He bit his lip. It was one thing to take care of Holster's problem, but Ransom was going to be in the same boat by the time this was over. Holster stopped him when he started to crawl back over. "What?"

"You grab one too. I brought them for both of us..."

Ransom was speechless. When he had teased Holster about being gagged, he had not intended him to put his mouth to work like that. "You don't have to..."

"Yeah, I know. Do you not want me to?"

"No, I do. Uh... Okay," Ransom grabbed the second condom and stood up. He handed the first one to Holster, who shifted carefully back on the bed and lied down on his side. Ransom stripped down to his boxer briefs and crawled on top of bed, where he paused. Holster was mostly naked in his bed, his boxers pulled low on hips to expose himself, the condom already on. It would be truly horrible if someone were to walk in on them like this, but they had barely touched each other in the past week and Ransom no longer cared. He just wanted Holster. He wanted to feel like he was _his_ , if only for a few minutes. "Uh..."

"Okay. Come here," Holster said with a small affirming nod of his head and reached a hand out to Ransom's hip as they positioned themselves. He gripped the other man's skin tightly, hoping it would mask his tremble. 

Ransom kissed along Holster's inner thigh, biting lightly when he felt the other man's mouth close around him. Holster let out a quiet groan. "Sorry..." Ransom whispered, kissing over the spot before following Holster's lead.

It was probably a bad idea to do this in Oluransi family's home, as both men struggled to keep silent. Holster was still blown away that Ransom had initiated it, and was now eagerly following through. It was over after only a few minutes and Holster rested his head on Ransom's thigh like a pillow as he caught his breath. The exchange had been more intense than he expected, and he could not help but wonder what it would be like when they did not have to worry about staying quiet. " _Fuck_..." Was all he managed to whisper.

"Yeah..."

"Do you think anyone heard us?"

"Nah, I think we were pretty quiet. Besides, Dami's room is next door and she usually listens to music on her headphones," Ransom sat up, one foot off the bed. "I can't believe we just did that. That's a first for me."

Holster sat up as well, their lips meeting in a kiss. "You were good, don't worry."

He chuckled self-consciously. "No, I meant first time ever fooling around with someone in this room... But thanks, bro."

"Really? Never?"

"Yeah. I've never brought any girl I've dated into this house. You're the first- uh- I mean, even my friends in high school -- I went out if I wanted to hang out with them, or saw them at school."

"So I'm the first person you've ever brought home to meet your family?"

"Yeah, I guess you are..." Ransom said with a small smile. "No wonder my fam-!" No wonder his family had assumed he had been in a relationship with Holster all this time. He had never brought any girlfriend around.

"No wonder what?"

"Nothing. Forget about it. We should get some sleep before someone catches us," Ransom kissed him once more to distract him before standing and getting dressed into his pjs. He settled into bed on the air mattress. 

Holster yawned and pulled his pants back on, curling up under the covers. "I'm really the only person who's ever met your family?"

"Yeah, bro. You're the only one crazy enough to handle my huge-ass extended family. I couldn't bring just anyone around."

"Hah," Holster chuckled. "Good night, Justin."

Ransom smiled as his heavy eyelids slid closed. "Good night, Adam."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Akara looks delicious and I want to eat a bunch of them. Also, boys are heading back to Samwell in the morning... Unless they decide to make a pit stop and spend the day (and night) somewhere special for New Years... Hm...  
> PLEASE leave a comment if you enjoyed the chapter/fic so far! I'm a little insecure about writing more *adult* content so comments/feedback is much appreciated!


	3. Chapter 3

"Drive safe, okay?" Ransom's mom said as she hugged him, then Holster, goodbye.

"Always. I promise," Holster assured her as Ransom continued on hugging his sisters. "Thanks for the snacks."

"I keep my boys fed," she tapped his stomach as they ended their hug and he laughed.

Ransom hugged Dami first, then Ife. Ife clung to him a little longer than usual. "Please don't say anything. At least until we've left, okay?" He whispered.

"I won't. I love you, little bro. Call me if you ever need to talk."

"I will," Ransom took a step back, closer to Holster's car. "Well, I guess we're off. Sorry I missed dad before he went to work. Tell him goodbye for us, okay?"

"Of course," Ife suddenly pulled Holster in for a tight hug. "It's always nice to see you, Adam. Please be good to my brother, and come back to visit again. You're a part of this family too."

Holster laughed off his shock and smiled. "Thanks."

The two men got into Holster's car and drove off with one final wave. "When do you want to switch off for driving? Halfway? Let me know if you're tired."

"Halfway sounds good..." Holster adjusted his glasses. "Bro, I think your sister totally has a thing for me."

"That's definitely not it."

"Pretty sure that's it. She hugged me for like, 15 seconds. I don't think she's ever hugged me. It's a sign. She's into me."

"And if she was? Then what?"

Holster laughed. "What do you mean? Then nothing. Don't worry, im not gonna date your sister, bro. It would feel too weird, like dating a cousin or something," he shuddered. 

"Good."

"Were you actually worried?"

"A little," Ransom admitted. He looked over at Holster to gauge his reaction, but his blue eyes remained trained on the road in front of him. "But she doesn't have a crush on you anyway so it doesn't matter."

The blond man grinned. "You sure? She said I was like part of the family, and that I was always welcome to visit, and to-" Holster stopped. _To be good to Ransom?_ "Holy shit. Does she think I'm your boyfriend???"

"I set her straight about everything last night, but yeah. She had assumed that was why we were always together."

"Crap. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make it look like that in front of your family."

"It's fine. Like I said... I told her we were just friends. Best friends." Ransom sighed.

Holster cleared his throat. Those words suddenly hurt more than they ever had before. He pulled the car over on the side of the highway. "Do you want to go to Niagara Falls?"

"What? I figured we'd cross at Buffalo."

"It's not like my family is home right now anyway," Holster shrugged his shoulders. His family typically took a vacation to somewhere warm during the winter break. "I know we go there all the time, but that usually just in summer. We've never really gone there in winter."

"You want to actually _go_  to Niagara Falls? Like spend the day?"

"Or we could drive to New York City and watch the ball drop in Times Square."

Both of them laughed at the mention of 'ball drop' like they were not grown men. "If we went to NYC we could spend New Years with Nursey..." Ransom grinned. "Man, what would _that_ even look like?"

"Lying in a snow bank, getting stoned, and listening to him analyze 90s rap music and talk about how bad Dex wants to fuck him," Holster smirked. " _Probably_."

"Fuck, dude. _Definitely!_ " They both broke into giggling fits again. "So that's a hard no for NYE in NYC."

"So what do you think? Check out the falls? Hotels are probably crazy expensive, but I'm sure there's a motel we could crash at after the fireworks that's not too bad," he suggested. Was he pushing it too far? Maybe Holster should not have said anything in the first place. He looked away, awaiting Ransom's answer. "Or not. We could just drive home like planned, too..."

Ransom nodded his head slowly as he thought about it. "No, let's go. Worst case scenario, we can't find a room somewhere and carry on back to Samwell, but if we can... Let's spend New Years in Niagara Falls. It's kinda like 'our' spot, right?"

"Yeah..." Holster smiled. "Maybe we could check out that steakhouse we always go to."

"Yeah..."

******

"I can't believe we're eating dinner at 4:30 like old men..." Ransom chuckled as they sat at the steakhouse.

"It can't be helped. Reservations were all booked up for the real mealtimes. We can get those beavertail dessert things you like later if we get hungry again."

"Lucky our nice Christmas clothes were clean, huh?"

"And lucky our shitty motel room has an iron," Holster grinned. "Thanks for saying yes to all this, man. I've had a lot of fun so far."

"Of course," Ransom smiled, then distracted himself with his glass of ice wine. "This might be weird to say, but... Are we on a date right now? We kinda are, right?"

"Oh. Yeah, maybe. Is that okay?" 

"Sure, that's fine. I said we could do this sort of stuff off-campus to help you get comfortable, remember?"

Right. Their agreement. For a moment, Holster had forgotten about it. Of course that was all this was --  this was not a real date. "Okay. Cool," he smiled. "So... Would it be asking too much if we pretended to be a real couple? Just for tonight?"

Ransom chuckled. "Pretty sure people already think that, but sure. Let's do it," he raised his glass in a cheers motion. "Oh, uh- by 'let's do it' I meant the couple thing, not... Unless... What is included in being a 'real couple' for the night?"

"Oh! No! Nothing you'd be uncomfortable with, I swear. You said from the start that you couldn't, so..."

"I said not _immediately_. It's, uh, I mean, it's been a month or so already, so..."

Holster felt his face heat up. Were they really discussing this right now? Was Ransom saying he was willing and able? This was too much for a dinner conversation; they were being vague, but they were still in the middle of a nice restaurant. "Let's put a pin in it for now. We should figure out what our plans are for the rest of the day. What's the line-up for that concert look like? Did you check?"

Ransom welcomed the distraction, although part of him had hoped that Holster would agree to it. All signs were pointing to the idea that he might be coming around to Ransom, but once again, the window of opportunity had been shut. "Looks like Down with Webster, the guy from Great Big Sea, a Styx cover band and Tom Cochrane."

"Sounds like something right up Jack's alley," Holster chuckled.

"True. Still, I think we kind of _have to_ go, right? We can't spend New Years here and not watch the countdown and fireworks," Ransom reasoned.

"You're right. Okay, it's a date." Holster grinned and took a bite of his steak.

******

Holster woke up from his nap with Ransom's arms around him. The alarm clock on the nightstand read 9:15pm. "Holy shit. Rans! Wake up." He tapped the other man's arm. "We slept for _three_ hours."

Holster hurried from the bed once he was sure Ransom was awake to go take a quick shower. They returned to their motel to kill time after dinner, and had both fallen asleep watching a countdown of the year's biggest celebrity scandals on TV.

Ransom got dressed for the night and waited for Holster to be finished with his shower. He had showered when they first returned to the motel room. "I guess we kind of wasted our 'date' night, eh?" He watched Holster breeze out of the bathroom fully dressed and hair mostly dry.

"Not true. Real couples do boring things like nap together all the time," Holster replied before turning on the hairdryer. "You ready?" he called over the noise.

"Yeah, bro." Ransom slipped on his coat, touque and warm gloves.

Holster set down the hair dryer and got dressed in his outerwear as well. "You didn't bring a scarf?"

"Nah, I think I forgot it at my parents' house. I'll buy a new one later, no worries."

"Well here," Holster began as he picked up his scarf. "Wear this for now. We'll share. We can switch off later."

"Sure. Thanks," Ransom smiled as he wrapped the scarf around his neck. "Ready?"

"Yeah. Let's go."

The two men headed down near the falls, and Ransom saved their seats on a bench while Holster went to grab coffee and snacks for them both.

When Holster returned, he found a pretty girl sitting on the bench with Ransom and chatting happily. Holster hesitated, staying back to watch them for a minute. Once again, it hit him just how bizarre their arrangement was. He kept letting himself get caught up in the moment, but when this was over, they would go back to being friends and Ransom would go back to dating pretty girls.

"Medical school? Wow!"

"I don't know where yet, but yeah, that's the plan. I guess whichever school would take me." Ransom smiled.

"What's your GPA like?"

"4.0."

"Wow! You don't have to worry much, then. Pretty sure you can take your pick with grades like that!" She laughed. "Smart _and_ cute, huh? Your b-"

"What the hell, Jess?" Another man approached them.

"Oh, hey! I was wondering where you were."

"Really? Cuz it looks _and sounds_ like you were flirting with this guy instead."

"Whoa! Wait a sec, man. We were just talking..." Ransom lifted his hands and waved them in a small surrender sign.

"I'm not talking to you, asshole. Get away from my girlfriend."

"What? But I was here-"

Holster hurried in to hopefully diffuse the situation. "Sorry I'm late, babe. The line was longer than I expected." He set the cardboard drink tray and bag of snacks down on the bench between Ransom and the girl.

Ransom smiled with relief at the sight of him. "No problem. You cold? Take your scarf back, I feel fine now." He slung the scarf over Holster's neck and used it to pull him in for a kiss.

Holster smiled and glanced over at the girl and her jealous boyfriend. "Is there a problem here?"

"Nah. Just a misunderstanding. We good now, bro?" Ransom looked over at the stunned boyfriend.

"I, uh... Yeah. Sorry."

"I'm _really_ sorry, guys." The girl stood and tugged on her boyfriend's sleeve. "Ugh. Come on, Zach. You're so embarrassing. I know Stacie was a total bitch, but _I'm_ not going to cheat on you -- especially not with a random guy I meet in the park. _Especially_ one who makes a point of mentioning his boyfriend _immediately_ in the..." She became harder to hear the farther she dragged her boyfriend away.

Holster took a seat and tried to approach the conversation casually. "So, you told her you had a boyfriend, huh?"

"We're supposed to be a real couple today, right? I just did what I would do in real life."

"Did she hit on you?"

"No. She was looking for her boyfriend and asked if I was from here. I told her I was from Toronto but went to Samwell, and we started talking about school. She's an econ major at York University, so I told her that's what you were studying too."

"Oh! So that's why you ended up telling her you applied to medical school. You were just talking about university." Holster laughed lightly with relief.

"How did you know that? Oh god, were you _spying_ on me?"

"Not intentionally! I thought maybe you were hitting on her so I gave you some space, that's all."

Ransom sighed, a little irritated. "It's real for tonight, right? I would never do that to someone I was dating, _especially_ you."

"Oh. Sorry, bro. I didn't mean anything by it..." _Especially me?_ Holster looked for a distraction, and remembered the bottle in his coat pocket. "Hey, want to make that coffee into an Irish Coffee?" He pulled out a small bottle of whiskey.

"Where'd you get that?"

"I made a quick stop on my way to that Beavertail place." Holster took a swig and passed Ransom the bottle while he removed the coffee lids. "It will help keep us warm."

"You know that's not actually how it works-"

"Shush, med school. It's New Year's Eve, we're having _at least_ one drink, even if we have to sneak it into our coffee."

Ransom laughed. "You don't have to convince _me_." He took a sip before pouring some into both of their coffee cups. He grimaced. "Shit, that burns."

Holster chuckled and put the lids back on, then hid the bottle back inside his coat. "Cheers?" He lifted his cup.

"Cheers," Ransom said with a smile. "Here's to 2016."

"There's nobody I'd rather spend it with," Holster admitted as they touched cups and each took a gulp.

"Me neither."

Holster leaned over and kissed him. "We should do this next year. Or- _oh_. I guess this is our last year..." The thought of graduating made his heart ache. It was only hitting him now that they would not be driving from Samwell and back any more after this. "Shit."

Ransom swallowed the lump rising in his throat. Reality was fully hitting him too. Less than five months left until graduation. "Do you know what you're going to do after grad?"

"Go home to Buffalo and start looking for a job, I guess." Holster shrugged his shoulders. "I guess your plans depend on which school you decide to go to..."

"Well, we'll see where I get accepted first."

"It will be _all_ of them. You're brilliant."

Ransom laughed modestly. "Come on, bro. Stop..." He cleared his throat. "You know, if I end up somewhere close by we could still meet up here next year."

Holster smiled and leaned back on the bench. "That would be nice."

"Actually, I'll be in Toronto with my family for the holidays either way. So it will be nothing to drive down and meet up, even if you can't make it for Christmas."

"You still want me to come for Christmas after we graduate? Or are you saying that 'in character' since we're pretending this is all real right now?"

Ransom sighed again. "Can we stop pointing it out with words like 'real' or 'pretending' for the rest of the night? You're my boyfriend tonight. End of story. Let's just be normal about it," he said, taking another sip of his spiked coffee. "And _of course_ , you're always welcome to celebrate Christmas with my family."

"Hm," Holster smiled and leaned over again, stopping before their lips connected. "Okay. I'd like that." Ransom closed the final distance between them and Holster could feel his hand slide around to grip the back of his neck. What were they even doing? At a party was one thing, but Holster was not in the habit of making out with anybody in _actual_ public... But this was Ransom. Holster did not care what anybody else thought in the moment; after their conversation about graduation, he just wanted to be as close to Ransom as he could for the rest of their time together.

******

"10! 9! 8! 7!" The crowd began chanting with increased enthusiasm. As the seconds ticked closer to 2016, someone nearby remarked about getting a 'fresh start' in the new year. Both men heard it and their eyes met in brief panic. This was the year that everything was going to change. 

"Holtzy, bro..."

"Bro, I know."

"3! 2! 1!"

Ransom gripped two handfuls of Hoster's coat and pulled him in for a kiss. It was fevered and desperate, and while everyone around them let go and embraced the new year, they clung to the moment. "Can we go back to our room?"

Holster was stunned, only managing to nod his head as Ransom took his hand and started dragging him through the crowd. He finally spoke when the noise of the fireworks exploding over the falls had died down. "Are you... You're _serious?_ Are you sure?"

"Yeah."

Holster pulled back as they broke away from the crowd. "Ah, shit. Wait, wait!"

"What's wrong?"

"You _really_  want to do this?"

"Yeah. Don't you?"

"I do. I _**really**_  do. But you-"

"Then there's no problem. Let's go."

Holster did not remember how exactly they got back to the motel, and only half of that could be blamed on the whiskey. Before he knew it, they were back inside their motel room and wearing entirely too many layers. He shook off his gloves ao that he could unzip Ransom's winter coat while Ransom removed the scarf around the taller man's neck, using it as an excuse to pull him in for another kiss like he had earlier in the night. They dropped their coats on the floor and kicked off their boots on the way to the bed. 

"Fuck!" Hoslter whispered as Ransom quickly unbuttoned his shirt and moved on to his jeans before sitting back to pull his own shirt over his head. He pulled Ransom back down on top of him immediately. "Take off your pants, too."

"Yeah." Ransom twisted them onto their sides as both men struggled out of their pants and underwear while trying not to accidentally knee each other. He slid his thigh between Holster's legs and thrusted their hips together. He let out a moan when one of Holster's hands squeezed his ass, forcing their bodies impossibly closer and causing him to bite down lightly on the blond's shoulder where he had been kissing. "Shit, sorry."

"It's okay," Holster whispered, angling their bodies so that their lips could meet. He nipped Ransom's lip as playful payback as they kissed deeper. His breathing was ragged, frotting their bodies together in one hand. The heat from Ransom's chest pressed against his, and the feeling of his hands gripping his back were no longer enough. Holster wanted more. "I'm ready."

"Ready? To have sex? You're sure?"

"Yeah," Holster said in a husky voice that made a shiver run down Ransom's spine. "Are you?"

"Yeah, bro." Ransom nodded. He climbed out of bed and went to Holster's bag to grab the condoms and lube, trying to calm his nerves as he crawled back in. "I just, uh... Give me a minute to prepare mentally, and uh, _otherwise_..."

Holster touched his arm. "Holy shit, dude. You're shaking. We don't have to-"

"No, I _want_ to. But-" Ransom sighed and pressed his forehead against Holster's neck. "Shit. Okay, you're 6'4" right? So you're a big guy and you're uh, _well-proportioned,_ so... I know it's going to be fine, but I just need to, you know, get ready."

"Oh. You thought _I_ was- I mean, we _can_ , but I thought it would be better if you were the one to, you know, uh, 'top' or whatever. Sorry, maybe we should've discussed this before, but I didn't think we'd ever get this far, so... I thought since you've had anal with girls before that maybe you'd know what to do, but- If you _**can't**_ , I understand. It's a lot to ask and you've-"

Ransom kissed him. "Okay. It's okay. I want to, Adam. _Fuck_ , I _really_  want to..." His hands gripped Holster's waist possessively. "Okay?"

"Yeah." Holster gulped as one of Ransom's hands traveled lower, inserting one lubed finger, then another. Holster squirmed and hooked one leg around the other man's hip. " _Fuck!_ " He moaned as Ransom's fingers hit his prostate. 

"Still good?"

"Yeah, just- I'm ready. Let's do it." Holster bit back what he really wanted to say. _I love you._ "I trust you."

"Okay," Ransom said with a nod of his head and he sat back to apply his condom. "Um, this might be easier if you get on your knees. At least at first until you're used to it..." He remembered in that moment the reason their arrangement existed in the first place -- Holster had been traumatized by a bad experience, but Ransom did not know many details. Maybe being behind him would trigger a bad memory, and the last thing he wanted was to upset Holster or make things worse. "Unless that's too much. Whatever you're comfortable with, man. You call the shots. I don't even know if that's _true,_ it's just what I've been told and-"

Holster sat up as well, capturing his lips in a kiss. "Justin. I trust you." To be honest, Holster was not sure he could handle any prolonged eye contact with his best friend at the moment. He turned his body so that he was kneeling on the bed, leaning forward with his elbows on a pillow, while Ransom positioned himself behind him and applied more lube to them both. The position felt a little embarrassing, but it gave Holster a chance to gather his composure. He gasped and gripped he pillow as Ransom pressed inside him. "Ah! Fuck!"

"What's wrong? Does it hurt? Want me to stop?"

"No," Holster tried to steady his breathing, he heard that it helped to relax. "No, I'm good. It feels... It doesn't _hurt_ , but it feels weird."

Ransom stayed still except for his hands gently rubbing Holster's lower back, hips, and sides of his thighs. "Weird how? Want me to pull-"

"No. Give me a sec, I'll be fine. It's not a _bad_ kind of weird, it's just- bigger than a finger, you know?" Holster laughed quietly. Ransom's warm hands were soothing on his body. "Okay, try moving."

Ransom pulled back and pressed back in again with a few slow, shallow thrusts. "How's this?"

"Good. Keep going." He moaned softly when Ransom pushed in as deep as he could go. "More."

Ransom gripped his hips and started gradually moving faster until he found a good rhythm, relishing in the sounds Holster made every time he hit his prostate. "Still good?"

"Yeah, but..."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing, but... Can I turn around now? I want to face you."

"Of course," Ransom said as he pulled out without warning, earning a groan from Holster. "Shit. Sorry. You okay?"

Holster twisted onto his back and pulled Ransom down on top of him, grinding their hips together. "I'm fine. _More_ than fine." He rubbed his hands along the other man's hard abs. " _Fuck_. You're so sexy, it's not even fair..."

At that, Ransom hooked Holster's legs over his shoulders and surged forward to kiss him, sliding back inside in the same motion. Holster gripped his waist and kissed him eagerly. "You're one to talk, bro..." Ransom was still in slight disbelief that this was really happening. He was having sex with Holster. He leaned in and purposely left a hickey on the blond man's neck, so that he would have proof in the morning that it had not been a dream. "Shit. You feel so good..."

Now that they were in a position where they could kiss again, Holster knew he would not last much longer. "Keep going. I'm almost there. You?"

"Yeah." Ransom grabbed one of the pillows, propping it under Holster to elevate his hips a little more. "Touch your dick. I want to see you come."

Holster inhaled sharply, those words had almost been enough to push him over the edge. He gripped the back of Ransom's neck and dragged him in, their kisses become increasingly desperate. This was finally happening. He was having sex with Ransom. Three years of silent wanting and now here they were -- and it was better than he ever imagined it would be. Holster reached down and started stroking in time with Ransom's thrusts, moaning as he felt the other man grinding inside against that special spot until he could no longer hold back. "Fuck! Justin!" He came and the feeling rippled through his entire body. "Holy shit!" He panted for air and clung to Ransom's shoulders and his body trembled involuntarily, only vaguely aware when the other man came as well.

Ransom pulled out and collapsed on top of him. "Oh my god. Adam. I can't- _holy shit._ I don't even know what words I want to say, just... _Oh my god.._." He slid his body up a little higher, Holster's cum slick between them, and kissed the taller man. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah. I, holy sh... I didn't know sex could feel like _that_. Totally different experience... Dude, you have to try it sometime..." Holster rambled, still trying to catch his breath.

"Maybe later when we catch our second wind," Ransom suggested. 

"You actually _want_ to? O-okay, sure. We, uh, really should shower right now..."

"In a minute," Ransom smiled and kissed him lazily. "Let's stay here a little longer."

******

Holster woke up the next morning and stared up at the unfamiliar ceiling of their motel room. They had not ended up having sex a second time that night, instead only kissing in the shower and in bed until both men grew too tired to continue and drifted off to sleep. The sex had been incredible, Holster had never felt more connected to Ransom, or anyone else, in his entire life. Therein lied Holster's problem. 

It was something Ransom had said while they were in the shower. He asked if the arrangement was over now that they had sex. Holster had dismissed the question with a kiss, telling him they would discuss it in the morning... And now morning had arrived. Last night's passion was over, and reality weighed heavily on Holster's chest. Ransom was doing all of this to help him as part of their arrangement -- he did not feel the same way, never had. It was time to put an end to this before Holster hurt himself any more than he already had. Any further, and he was at a serious risk of destroying their friendship.

"Rans, wake up." He shook the other man's shoulder. "It's already 9:00. We need to head out. Lots of driving ahead."

"Hm?" Ransom rolled over and rubbed the sleep from his eyes. He smiled. "Good morning."

"Morning." Holster smiled back. "We should get out on the road soon."

Ransom kissed him gently. "It's nice doing that first thing in the morning."

Holster pulled back and crawled out of bed. "Yeah, about that..." He chewed his lip. "I think we should talk about last night."

"Did I do something wrong?" His smile faded.

"No. It's not you..." Holster sighed. "Let's talk in the car, okay?"

They dressed quickly and got in the car, Holster drove. They did not speak until they had crossed the border and had grabbed breakfast from a drive-thru. Ransom carefully positioned his open coffee in the cup holder. "So... Are we going to talk or not? Was I too pushy? Are you sore? What did-"

"I told you already, you did nothing wrong..." Holster took a deep breath. "Last night was great. Really. I just think we should put an end to this arrangement. You've been a big help, I mean it, but I think the longer we let this continue..."

"What?"

"I think it's best if we stop this before personal feelings ruin our friendship. You're the best friend I've ever had, I don't want to lose you because we let this get out of hand."

Ransom felt like he had been punched in the gut. So this was it. Holster knew how he felt, and was trying to let him down gently. Not that he was particularly surprised that Holster knew, it was pretty obvious after last night. He swallowed down the lump in his throat and nodded his head in agreement. "Nah, totally. I get it. I completely agree. Things got a little weird there, huh?"

"Yeah. Weird."

"Glad we're on the same page, then. Bros for life, right Holtzy?" Ransom laughed it off as though he was not currently staring at the hickey he had left on the blond's neck. It was not a dream, but it might as well have been. Game over.

"Absolutely." Holster gripped the steering wheel a little tighter. "Can you put some music on? Can't head back to Samwell without some epic road trip sing-alongs, right?" It was better this way. Ransom would never consider him more than a friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter took a while to write, mostly because I realized I had backed myself into a corner and needed to write a sex scene. Not sure why that didn't occur to me when I started off writing racy content. Haha oops! Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter, stay tuned for the next one! 
> 
> There's going to be a bit of a time-skip between this and the next chapter. I mean, I COULD write a month and a half of angst and further misunderstandings, but I think we want to skip closer to the happy ending part, right?
> 
> Thank you for reading so far! Please leave a comment and let me know what you think! (Also, any typos. I write this on my phone/iPad and get the weirdest autocorrects sometimes along with my human error typos lol)


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You're different from the ones before, I know you don't believe it's you I've waited for.  
> I was the one you took home, Never a flame to burn slow,  
> But I was hoping you'd see me a different way.  
> So many bodies I've touched, Crushing around me like dust,  
> You are the realest thing I've never had to fake.  
> I don't need nobody but you

**February 14th, 2016: Valentine's Day**

"Bro! What are your plans tonight?" Ransom hopped down the last few stairs in order to catch Holster in the hallway. 

Holster's breath caught in his throat. "Nothing much. Probably going to watch the Falconers' game then the Vegas/Dallas game... You?"

"You're in luck, then! I scored you a date tonight."

"What? With who? Why?"

Ransom hooked his arm around Holster's shoulders as they walked to the kitchen. "I know our, uh, 'arrangement' is over and things have been kinda... _strange_  between us since... But I still want to help you out and I'm afraid that how we left everything might have just made things more complicated for you. So, I found you a date for tonight. He's a really nice guy, I promise. You'll have a good time."

"I don't think I'm-"

"Give him a chance, okay?" Ransom removed his arm from around the taller man's shoulders and grabbed a beer from the fridge. Bitty had been away all weekend, and without fresh baking to lure their teammates around, the Haus was unusually quiet. "Please? You've been kinda a hermit lately and it's all my fault-"

"It's not your fault." Holster grabbed a beer as well and strode into the living room. "This dry spell existed long before New Year's Eve, okay? Or Thanksgiving, or Halloween..."

"All the more reason to get back out there. You don't have to _do_  anything, just go for dinner and have some drinks with the guy. He's on the soccer team. Good bro," Ransom said as he sat down on the 'new' couch Jack had bought a couple months earlier.

"Fine. I'll go," Holster sighed in defeat. It was not like he had any other prospects for Valentine's Day, and Ransom was right, it had been a while since he had done anything besides go to class and play hockey. Maybe it was for the best to have a distraction tonight of all nights. "What are you up to tonight?"

"I don't know. Might chill with March for a bit," Ransom said with a shrug.

And there it was. The reason Holster needed a distraction tonight -- Ransom was spending time with March again. They went out at least once, usually twice, a week lately. "What time should I be ready tonight?"

"He'll be here at eight."

"Okay," Holster chugged his beer and put the empty can down on the coffee table. "I'm gonna take a nap."

"Really? I thought we could play some COD..."

"I'm tired. See ya later."

Ransom watched him round the corner into the hallway and listened to his footsteps as he ascended the stairs. He sighed and stretched out on the couch, covering his eyes with his forearm. "Shit..." He had made a mess of everything. He never should have proposed that stupid arrangement in the first place. Things with Holster still had not returned to the way things were before -- they were _almost_ there, any time they were in a group setting things felt normal again -- but it was if they had forgotten how to be alone with each other anymore. 

What was worse, was that Ransom could not talk to the one person who always helped him through whatever stressed him out -- _Holster_. Instead, Ransom had been spending more time talking to March. She was the only one he could confide in about the situation with Holster. He had met with her once before the Christmas break to properly explain himself and beg for her forgiveness, and to March's credit, she had been very understanding. Since it turned out that the progress he _thought_ he was making with Holster was all for naught, Ransom and March had been meeting more frequently whenever he needed to vent his feelings.

Bitty entered the Haus with a smile on his face. "Rans? If you're going to nap, do it in your room." He poked his head into the living room as he removed his coat.

"I'm not sleeping," Ransom said with a sigh, sitting up and taking a sip of his beer. "Just thinking."

"Is something wrong?"

"It's fine, Bits. Don't worry. How's Jack? I thought you would be back late tonight, it _is_ Valentine's Day..."

"I have to finish up a project due tomorrow, and Jack has a game, so we celebrated last night."

"Well that explains the big smile on your face..." Ransom grinned.

"Oh, stop!" Bitty laughed, disappearing into the kitchen. "Oh! You'll never guess who I met on Fri- oh?" Bitty returned to find the living room empty, save for Ransom's half-full beer. Bitty frowned. The stress of their senior year seemed to be getting to the co-captains. Both Ransom and Holster had been acting stranglely since their final semester started.

******

"I know it sucks, but maybe it's for the best that you set him up on that date..." March was lying next to Ransom on his bed, staring up at the slanted attic ceiling. 

They met up for coffee earlier that afternoon, and had been hanging out in the common room of her dorm until half the volleyball team showed up and made it impossible to have a private conversation. The Haus was not much different, with the Falconers and the Aces both having games that night, the living room was crowded with dateless hockey players drinking beer and yelling at the TV, and so the pair found themselves in the attic where they could finally talk in peace, a jockstrap hanging on the doorknob to ensure their privacy.

"I know," Ransom said with a heavy sigh. "I just wish I knew what I could have done differently. I really thought he was starting to like me for a while."

"And you're _sure_ he doesn't?"

"He gave me the 'let's be friends, don't let your personal feelings get in the way' talk first thing in the morning after we had sex. Yeah, I'm sure. He doesn't even want to be alone in the same room as me if he can help it, and considering that we share this bedroom, he's done an incredible job of avoiding me for the past month and a half."

March sighed heavily in solidarity. "I wish I could feel superior right now and make some comment about how bad guys are at telling each other how they feel, but girls are just as terrible at it sometimes."

"Oh? What happened?"

"Things have been weird between April and I ever since we made out, too. I know it's not as big a scale as you and Adam, but I feel your pain to a certain extent."

"What? When did this happen?" Ransom laughed.

"Last week at some stupid party. I've had a dumb little crush on her for almost two years and this Lacrosse guy dared us to kiss and I thought April would definitely say no, but she _didn't_ , so we started making out and, well, it's just been awkward since."

"I thought she was glaring at me even more than usual."

"Yeah, sorry." March bit her lip. "What are you going to do if Adam ends up actually liking this Scott guy? Just fade into the background and pretend to be happy that you're the reason they met?"

"You said it yourself, it's probably for the best. I think part of my problem is that he hasn't been dating or hooking up with anybody, so every time I look at him I inevitably start thinking 'why not me?' and then everything spirals out from there. Maybe if I _know_  he's on a date and I _know_  he likes someone else then I can finally start thinking straight."

"Yeah, good luck with that."

"I'm hopeless, aren't I?"

"Yep. Total train wreck. Can't believe I used to date you."

Ransom chuckled. "Oh god, I haven't even told you the worst part. We fooled around at my parents' house the last night there..."

"That's the worst part?"

"No, the _worst_  part is that it was immediately after I told my sister that he wasn't my boyfriend and she was so upset that she cried... _Then_  I got a text from her a week later asking why she found used condoms in my room when she emptied the garbage. I ended up having to tell her everything. Supes awkward."

"How did she take that news?" March asked.

Ransom sighed. "She thought I was lying at first, and by the end I think she mostly just pitied me."

"Ouch. Wow. I suddenly don't feel so bad about my situation anymore."

"Thanks. Lesson of the day is: don't hook up with friends. Got it."

"Well, unless you're sure you're both on the same page about what it means."

"What? Like you and April?"

March laughed. "Well, you and I are friends now, right? And we know we're both interested in other people, and it wouldn't _mean_  anything if we hooked up again now, _unlike before_..."

Ransom turned his head to look at the blond woman lying beside him. "What are you saying?"

"I'm saying I'm sick of feeling feelings right now and need a fun distraction tonight -- we _both_ do. So? What do you think? Up for some stress relief?"

"Well, I guess we're both pretty stressed out..." Ransom reasoned. Holster would be out for at least a couple more hours, and he certainly could do with a distraction for part of that time. Otherwise, he would spend his time watching the clock and wondering what Holster was doing with his date.

******

Holster did his best to appear less drunk than he actually was -- it was not very convincing, as his date, Scott, paid the bill and knew exactly how much he had drank that night. Fortunately, the other man had his fair share as well, and did not mind. Somehow they had ended up back in Scott's dorm room, before Holster came to his senses. "Wait. I'm sorry, I can't do this..." Holster pushed back, interrupting their make out session.

"What's wrong?" The soccer player, a tall man with short brown hair, asked.

"To be completely honest, I'm in love with someone else... But I guess they don't feel the same way..." Holster explained as he re-buttoned his shirt. 

"If they don't, then why not give _me_ a chance...?" Scott kissed the nape of Holster's neck and undid the last button Holster had touched.

"I can't." Holster pushed back again, sliding over on the bed to put some space between them, but ending up against the wall. Scott was staring at him and did not look impressed.

"Are you serious, dude? You've been all over me since we left the restaurant," Scott huffed.

Holster gripped the blanket in his fist, bracing himself for the inevitable fight. He was drunk, but pretty sure he could knock out a tooth again if the situation called for it like last time.

 _Last time_. Holster gripped the blanket tighter in his fist, hoping to mask his tremble. He didn't feel like a 6'4", 220 pound, 24 year old anymore. For a moment, he was 17 and about to be overpowered by his older teammate for being a 'tease' again. Holster's mouth went dry and adrenaline surged in his body. How did it come to this again? He missed Ransom. He was never afraid for a second with Ransom.

Scott sighed and rubbed his face. "Okay. We probably shouldn't stay here if your heart is _that_ set against it. Can I walk you home, at least? You're a big guy and all, but you're also really drunk. I don't quite trust you to get across campus by yourself right now."

It took a moment for those words to sink into Holster's brain. Home? Everything was okay. Crisis averted. He took a deep breath. "Okay, sure. Thanks." His legs felt rubbery as he stood, relief washing the adrenaline from his body, and he gripped the wall to steady himself.

"Okay, yeah. _Definitely_ a good idea to walk you home. Come on," Scott said as he grabbed Holster's coat and handed it to him. "Are you seriously that drunk? Maybe you should go puke or something to get a bit of it out of your system."

"Ah, no, it's not... It's a leg cramp. I'm not too drunk to walk," Holster lied about the cramp, but it was easier than explaining why his legs felt like giving out. He tensed up briefly when Scott slid an arm around his waist, but relaxed again when he realized it was to help brace him as they walked. "I'm really sorry about this..."

"It's fine. I mean, it's _Valentine's Day,_ so I'd be lying if I said I thought this was how the night was gonna go down, but it's fine. It was a long shot when I asked Oluransi anyway. I honestly didn't even completely believe him when he said that yeah, you actually _did_ like guys."

"You asked him?"

"Yeah. Why do you sound so surprised?"

"I thought he had purposely found a date for me. I thought he had asked you..."

"Is there a difference?"

"Yeah, there is..." Holster somehow felt a little better, knowing that Ransom had not been trying to pawn him off on some random guy for the night, even though it did not change the fact that he was spending Valentine's Day with March.

"Care to elaborate?"

"Sorry, I don't think it would make any sense if I tried explaining right now," Holster admitted. "So... You actually _wanted_ to go on a date with me?"

"Why is that so hard to believe?" Scott asked.

"I don't know... Sorry the night was such a mess. I probably shouldn't have agreed when my head is stuck with someone else. It wasn't really fair to you. I'm sorry."

"The night wasn't a _complete_ disaster," Scott said with a laugh. "It's fine. Really. I get it. This stupid day messes with everyone's head, I've been there before too."

Holster smiled as they reached the Haus. "Uh, well, thanks -- for everything. You're a good guy."

"You too... and hey, if things don't work out with that other guy... Give me a call. You know, if you change your mind." Scott smiled and gave him a good night kiss. 

"I will. Thanks," Holster let out a nervous chuckle as he headed inside. The night had been a mess, but Scott was right, it had not been a complete disaster. He was nice. As Holster climbed the staircase to the second floor, he considered the possibility of going out with Scott again. 

Maybe it was time to move past his feelings for Ransom. It had been three years, and if nothing had come of their arrangement, then clearly nothing ever would. The sooner Holster could bring himself to move on from what happened during New Year's, the sooner his friendship with Ransom could return to normal. They could chalk it up to harmless experimentation, like they had any other time they fooled around before. There was no sense in reading into the fact that Ransom had not planned to find Holster a date that night -- he had eagerly jumped at the chance when it presented itself, so same difference. 

Holster froze when he reached the attic door. His heart sank -- there was a jock strap on the doorknob. Of course Ransom would be hooking up with March tonight, but where did they expect him to sleep? Holster turned and went back downstairs, his back would definitely punish him for sleeping on the couch all night, but Holster had no choice... Or did he? Instead of turning left into the living room, he grabbed his coat and ran back out the door. "Scott, wait!" He called as he rushed after the other man. "I've changed my mind. Let's go back to your place... If your offer still stands, that is..."

Scott grinned at the impulsive blond. "You sure?"

"Yeah. Why not, right?"

"Okay. Let's go."

******

Holster woke the next morning with a splitting headache. When he opened his eyes, he realized that he was in an unfamiliar room, in an unfamiliar bed, and wearing only his boxers. The door opened and Scott walked in carrying two coffees. Holster was in his dorm room.

"You're already awake? Impressive," Scott said with a quiet laugh.

Holster panicked and pulled the bedsheet up to his shoulders. "Shit. What did we do last night?"

"Nothing. Well, we made out again along with some harmless groping, but nothing more than that," Scott explained as he set Holster's coffee down on the nightstand. "You were too drunk to get it up, and I didn't trust your judgement in that state to let you do anything to me, so we mostly slept."

"Sorry for being a burden... I'm a total mess, huh?"

"It's okay, you seem to be dealing with a lot right now. It's okay to let your crazy out every once and a while. You even cried for a bit there last night."

That explained why Holster's eyes felt so uncomfortable. "Oh god, just when I thought I couldn't make a bigger ass of myself..."

"Oluransi is the guy you're in love with, huh?"

"Yeah. How did you know?"

"Just some of the stuff you said last night while you were upset. It wasn't hard to piece together," Scott said as he took a sip of coffee. "To be honest, I always sort of thought you two were already together. I didn't even believe either of you liked dudes, but there was _no_ other way I could place what was up with you guys. Really confusing." The brown-haired man chuckled.

"Yeah? Try living it." Holster groaned as he sat up, gripping his head. "Son of a bitch, this hangover might kill me."

"Hang tight, I'll get you some painkillers." Scott wandered into the bathroom and while he poured a glass of water, Holster got dressed.

"Thanks," Holster said with a tired smile as he took the pills and chased them with the glass of water. "What time is it?"

"8:45."

"Fuck. Well, I'm skipping class today to sleep this off. I hope I didn't make you miss any classes."

"It's fine. I don't start until 9:30."

"Lucky bastard," Holster half-laughed, half-groaned as he stood up. "I'm going to head home. I've imposed on you enough and Rans should be in class by now."

"I knew you guys both lived in that house, but I didn't realize you were _actual_  roommates. You're the only two who share a bedroom?"

"Yeah, well, the attic is bigger than the regular bedrooms... Did I tell you that we share a bedroom?"

"Yeah, last night. You were pretty mad about the jockstrap thing." Scott stopped Holster at the door. "Wait. One thing that I _didn't_ hear the answer to, is what happened when you finally told Oluransi you were in love with him?"

"He-" Holster froze, trying to remember how Ransom had reacted. He cursed his hangover for distracting him from the details of such an important moment. "I don't remember..."

" _Really?_ You can tell me, I'm not going to spread it around or anything. I spent half the night comforting my Valentine's date about their unrequited love for someone _else_ , I would kinda like to know how it got to that point."

Holster sighed. "Okay, let me think..."

"You _seriously_ don't remember?"

"Yeah," he said, taking a sip of his coffee. "Okay, well, we had sex on New Year's Eve and the next morning I told him that we should stop fooling around because I didn't want my personal feelings to ruin our friendship... And then he agreed and said it had gotten weird."

Scott's mouth fell open. "You've had sex with him? How long was that going on for?"

"It was just that one time. We were fooling around a bit before then, but nothing since that night." 

"Wow, you glossed over _that_ part last night." He laughed and shook his head. "So then, what happened when you actually said you loved him?"

"I... Well, that was it. I've never _told_  him so in as many words."

The brown haired man scoffed. "What? You've gotta be bloody kidding me..."

" _What?_ " Holster frowned. "I can't just _tell_ him something like that. He's my best friend, it would ruin everything. Not to mention that he's straight-"

"Dude. No. Just- no." Scott cut him off. "News flash -- if a guy has _sex_ with you he's _probably_  not straight."

"But-"

"Look, do what you want man, but in _my_ opinion -- you should probably tell him the whole truth. Who knows? It's gotta be better than confiding in your Valentine's Day hook-up. Things are already awkward with him, right? If it's going to be that way, it might as well be for the right reasons."

Holster groaned. "I know you're right, but this is going to be a disaster..."

Scott patted his shoulder. "Okay, fine. I wasn't going to say anything, but..."

"What is it?"

"When I asked Oluransi to set me up on a date with you, he looked kinda... Well, pissed at first, then hurt. It took him a few seconds to bounce back to his usual friendliness. It didn't make any sense to me at the time, but now that you've dropped that little tidbit of information about New Year's Eve..."

"You're right, I should talk to him." Although, it still did not change the fact that Ransom had March in their room all night. Holster felt like his stomach had twisted into a knot, and it could only partially be blamed on his hangover.

"Good," Scott opened the door for him. "And hey, keep me posted. I'm curious about where this goes. Fuck, you hockey guys cause a lot of drama..." He laughed. 

"Bro, you don't even know the half of it."

******

Ransom skipped his afternoon classes, he was not able to concentrate on anything anyway. March went home around 11:00pm the night before and he had drifted off to sleep waiting for Holster to return from his date. When he woke up again around 4:00am and found Holster's bed empty, he was not able to fall back asleep. Ransom trudged up the stairs of the empty Haus and dropped his bag on the desk with a soft thud, waking Holster from his nap. "You came home finally."

"I'm surprised you even noticed."

Ransom frowned at Holster's snarky comment. "What does that mean?"

"Guess."

"What the hell, man? _I'm_ not the one who stayed out all night. Your date obviously went well."

"No, actually. It was a total shit show. I made a jackass of myself all night long." Holster sat up in bed to look at him.

Ransom scoffed. "Well, at least you got _something_ out of it, right?"

"You're one to talk. You know, I wouldn't have needed to stay out overnight if you hadn't been fucking March in _our_ room all night long."

" _What?!_ Where the hell are you getting that from? We're just friends."

"Yeah, well so are we. What's your point?"

Ransom winced. "I didn't have sex with her last night."

"Bullshit. When I came home you-"

"...You came home last night?"

"Yeah, and your fucking jockstrap was on the doorknob so don't try to tell me that nothing happened," Holster said, breaking his glare as he rubbed his aching head. More painkillers were definitely in order.  

Ransom sighed. "Okay. We were considering it, but I couldn't do it, so we ended up talking some more and then she went home. I forgot that jockstrap was on the door until I left for class this morning."

"What do you mean you couldn't?"

"It means what it means -- I _couldn't_ do it. I didn't _want_ to. I kept thinking about you on your fucking date, and- wait. Where did you go after you saw the jockstrap?"

Holster kept his head in his hands. "Scott walked me home, and I guess when I saw the doorknob I ended up running after him and went back to his dorm..."

" _Fuck_. Did-" Ransom choked on his words. He resolved the night before to tell Holster how he really felt when he came home, but the fact that he had been out all night with another man had changed Ransom's plan. He brought one hand up to cover his face and he leaned back against the desk. "It serves me right for being such a chickenshit all this time..."

Holster looked up when he heard Ransom choke back a quiet sob. "Shit. Rans? Are you crying?"

This was it. Ransom was about to destroy their friendship, but he could not hold back anymore. "I never really knew what to call it, besides 'curious' when I was a teenager... And when I got accepted to Samwell and heard the '1 in 4' saying, I thought it was really cool. College is the time for experimentation anyway, but..."

"But?" Was Holster actually hearing this? Was Ransom coming out to him? He forced himself back into the moment to be sure he heard what Ransom said next.

"But after I got here, there was only one guy I ever _wanted_ to be with -- **_you._** I've been so afraid that I would scare you off, so I tried keeping things low-key and casual but I don't want to do that anymore. I never did. I finally realized how I _really_ felt over the summer, and since finding out that you're also attracted to guys, it's been constantly on my mind. I mean, we're perfect for each other, aren't we? Is there any chance you'll ever see me as _more_  than a friend?"

Holster could not believe his ears, nor his eyes. Ransom was starting to shake, and looked at him with sad eyes, trying to gauge Holster's reaction. Holster had seen him nervous and upset before, but this was on a whole new level. "Are you _kidding_ me?" Holster saw Ransom wince and realized how his words had come out. "No, I mean- I love you. I've loved you for the past three years, _at least._ I never thought I had a chance..."

"But... I _asked_ you if you were interested in anyone when you came out to me. You said no."

"I was afraid it would scare you off, too. Rans- _Justin_ , you're my best friend in the entire world. _**Ever**_. I would never forgive myself if I fucked this up. And that arrangement we made-"

"Terrifying, right? It was so hard not to blurt out everything I wanted to say."

"Exactly!" The two men excitedly agreed. Holster smiled. "So you... You love me too, right?"

Ransom let out a small chuckle and wiped his eyes to be sure he had stopped crying. "Yeah, bro. I love you. So, why aren't you kissing me already?"

Holster choked on a laugh as he stood from his bed and reached Ransom in two strides of his long legs. His head was still throbbing and his stomach felt a little queasy, but none of that mattered the moment their lips touched. Holster pushed against him, and Ransom sat back on the desk, wrapping both arms around Holster's waist.

The desk creaked and Ransom's hands immediately flew down to grip the top. "Holy shit! Move for a sec, I'm totally going to break this thing if I sit on it," he said as his feet touched back down on the floor. He let out a shaky laugh of relief and returned his arms to their previous place around Holster as they kissed again, this time while they were both standing.

"So... Bed?"

"Yeah. Bed." Ransom backed Holster towards the bed, moving one hand to the back of his head to guide him away from bumping it on the top bunk as they sat. Ransom tilted his head to kiss Holster's neck, but stopped when he noticed a small dark patch of skin already there. Scott. "Shit." He pulled away.

"What's wrong?"

"I should have said something sooner. Or remembered that stupid jock strap was on the door. Or not have set you up on that date in the first place..." Ransom rested his forehead in the crook of Holster's neck. "Did he ask you for a second date? Or did you ask him maybe? You guys used protection at least, right?"

"What? No," Holster scoffed. "We- _**no**_. Nothing happened. We made out, that's it."

"Really?"

"Yeah, and trust me. A second date is definitely off the table -- I apparently spent half the night talking about you..." Holster did not quite feel bold enough to repeat that Scott told him he had cried about it. Then again, this was _Ransom_ \-- the one man he trusted more than anyone else, and this was no time for macho 'boys don't cry' bullshit. "Fuck. I cried to him over you. I was so upset thinking that you set me up on a date to get me out of your hair..."

"It was never that. I didn't think it would be fair to deny you the chance at the date because of my own feelings. I thought you wanted to just stay friends with me, and maybe seeing you with someone else would finally bring that home and I could try moving on... But, fuck I really didn't want to."

"I thought the same thing -- that you just wanted to stay friends. That maybe New Year's and everything leading up to it was out of obligation. I always thought you were straight."

"Bro, I had _sex_ with you. And since when have I ever said I was straight?"

"Well, I guess you never _said_ it, but you only ever dated chicks so-"

"Same with you!"

Holster chuckled. "Touché."

"I may not have know exactly what to identify as, but it's never been 'straight' that's for sure," Ransom nuzzled his head against Holster's neck again. "I mean, I know we've always had a weirdly close friendship, but did you really think I would do all those things with you if I was straight? Nobody is _that_ good of a friend." He laughed.

Holster eased them both onto their sides, lying down in bed together with legs and arms entwined. He smiled into his kiss with Ransom. "I wish May wouldn't come. I don't want to graduate; I don't want to leave this place. We've wasted so much time..."

Ransom touched their foreheads together. "I don't know where I'll end up for med school yet... But you don't _have_ to get a job in Buffalo after graduation, right?"

"What?"

"I mean, you could theoretically get a job anywhere, right? Boston, New York, New Haven, Baltimore, maybe California..."

"I- well yeah, I guess so. Are you...?" His heart began pounding. As if Ransom could tell, he raised one hand and pressed it against Holster's chest.

"Would you move with me? Wherever that may end up being?"

"Of course, bro. Where are you hoping to go?"

"Boston would be my first choice, obviously, if I could get in."

"Harvard, huh? We could have a mini Samwell reunion with Shits, and Lardo, assuming she's going back to Boston after grad."

"Maybe we could all live together again?"

Holster scoffed. "Fuck no. I love Shitty, but I have seen that dude's balls enough to last ten lifetimes. Besides, if I get a decent job, I'm sure I could afford a place for just the two of us."

"And you'd be chill with having an ivy leaguer boyfriend?" Ransom teased, well aware of the other man's unwavering hatred of the entire Ivy League.

 _Boyfriend?_ Holster's heart skipped a beat."Well, if it's _you_ , then I don't really mind..." He grinned. "Anything that combines you and the word 'boyfriend' sounds pretty great to me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See? There was enough angst in this chapter without having to write all of January and half of February too lol. And a happy fluffy ending! Yay!!! Epilogue to follow!


	5. Epilogue

**March 5th, 2016**

Lardo joined Ransom and Holster on the couch, and took the controller from Holster's hand to pause their video game. "Hey!"

"Bitty and Jack are going to come down soon for their video. Are you guys ready? You know what you're going to say?"

"Yeah, more or less."

Following a scandal that forced one of Kent Parson's teammates on the Aces to come out as the NHL's first openly gay player, people and teams around the continent had been recording supportive videos. Jack was visiting Samwell that weekend to record a particularly special video -- he would come out about his relationship with Bitty during it. Bitty had called an unofficial meeting with the members of the Samwell men's hockey team who were already aware of their relationship after Jack had arrived on Friday night, and they explained their plan. The team would share their thoughts about playing on an inclusive team and at the end, Jack would confirm the rumours about Bitty being his boyfriend.

"Don't flake on this okay? It's important," Lardo warned them. "I know you've both been distracted lately, but a lot of people are going to end up seeing this, so we have to rep our school and the team right."

"Distracted? Pfft! We haven't been distracted. What distractions?"

"Just regular final semester distractions. Maybe _you're_ distracted, hm?"

Lardo eyed them curiously. "Uh-huh... Well if you guys deny it _that_  strongly, then it _must_  be true." She grinned, completely unconvinced. 

The door to Bitty's bedroom opened and the couple of the hour made their way downstairs. "Here we have our team manager, Larissa, and the current co-captains of the Samwell men's hockey team Adam and Justin," Bitty introduced them as he panned the camera from one end of the couch to the other. "Jack?"

"Right. Well, Bits and I-"

Bitty stopped him and lowered the camera. "Honey, no. You've been calling me Bittle all this time, stick to that. This is still primarily the team's video, we can't have any distractions from the message. Well, until the end at least." Bitty winked.

"Right. You're right. Of course," Jack cleared his throat and started over as Bitty raised the camera again for the next take. "Right. Well, Bittle and I thought you might want to share your thoughts on Samwell's LGBT-friendly reputation, and the responsibilities you face as team captains."

Ransom spoke up first. "Well, I think that reputation has put us in a unique position. I think it's pretty safe to say that we have a higher percentage of queer athletes on our team compared to most schools."

"I know that was part of the appeal for me, at least, when choosing schools," BItty chimed in.

"Exactly!" Holster agreed, slinging one arm casually around Ransom's shoulders as he spoke. "When you get down to it, we're all here because we love hockey. Let's face it, most of us aren't planning to continue on professionally -- we can't _all_  be Zimmermanns -- but regardless of that, we _love_ this game. I think it's great that we have guys playing here who feel safe, especially when you consider that they may not have even tried to join the team if they played elsewhere."

Ransom nodded eagerly. "Obviously, the ideal situation would be one where students felt comfortable being out on their teams anywhere, but for the time being we will continue to do everything we can to ensure a safe space at Samwell and especially on the team."

"Yeah. It's heartbreaking to think of all the missed chances and unknown potential out there because of a player's fear of rejection, or worse -- violence, just for being who they are. I really hope this and all the other videos help create change for the better."

"That's great. Thanks guys," Jack said with a small smile and a nod, before staring to lead the way towards the kitchen.

Bitty narrated as he followed along. "They used to try setting me up on dates all the time.  _Used to._ " He chuckled and Jack offered a small over-the-shoulder grin at him as they left the room.

"Fuck, those two sure are happy together, huh?"

"Yeah bro."

Lardo piped up unexpectedly. "Hey, remember when we found out they had been secretly dating for months, and you guys were sort of hurt that Bitty hadn't told you sooner? And you couldn't help but wonder why he didn't trust you enough to share that secret, even though you've been nothing but loving and supportive of him since day one and there is no way in hell you'd ever be anything but happy for them?"

"Yeah..."

" _Just checking._ " Lardo pointedly raised her eyebrows. 

The two men exchanged looks. Holster's arm tightened around Ransom's shoulder and he responded with a small nod of his head. "Hey, Lardo..."

"You and Rans are dating. I know."

"So... What do you think?"

"Well _obviously_  I'm happy for you guys -- you're my boys. I just don't understand why you're keeping it hidden after finally getting your shit together." Lardo shrugged.

"What do you mean _finally?"_

"Aside from you drunkenly confessing 'I'm in love with Ransom' to me while at Spring C two years ago? I _mean_ you've finally got through that fooling-around-while-pretending-it-doesn't-mean-anything rut you two have been in for the past few months."

Their jaws dropped and Ransom sputtered out a response. "I- we didn't- you knew?"

"The Haus has thin walls, brahs. You think we could hear Jack and Bits going at it but I couldn't hear you? I have a loft bed, I literally sleep a foot underneath your floorboards."

"So, Hausgiving..."

"Yeah. Shitty knows too. It helps when you put on music, but you didn't do that until after while you were talking, so yeah, we sort of heard everything."

Holster winced. "...Did you hear our conversation?"

"Nah, bro. Like I said, music helped. We also got a little... _distracted_ after that, so you know."

"You know, you never told us you were dating Shitty, either..."

"What's to tell? We're doing _literally_ the same thing we've always done." She shrugged again. "But yeah, Shitty definitely knows something is going on with you guys, Chowder saw you kissing at a Haus party and has been privy to some v-ball gossip, and Dex couldn't look _any_  of us in the eye after Hausgiving, so pretty sure he has an idea about what was up that night too."

Ransom burst into laughter, turning his head to laugh against Holster's shoulder. "Shit! I give up. Let's just tell everyone already." One hand slid up to rest on his boyfriend's leg. "Sorry we didn't tell you sooner, Lardo. This semester has been so crazy so far that I only ended up telling my family yesterday over Skype."

Holster chuckled and shook his head. "Oh god, they were so confused. Ife just snickered the whole time."

"Well, she was the only one who knew what was actually going on. Everyone else thought you were my boyfriend already."

"Hmm." Holster smiled. He smiled every time Ransom said that word. He turned his head and kissed his boyfriend. "I love it when you say that."

"Say what, bro?"

"Boyfriend, bro."

"Me too." Ransom's hand slid up from Holster's leg to tangle his fingers in the hem of his shirt, kissing him again.

"Dudes. I'm happy for you and all, but cool it on the PDA. You're not the only people on this couch, you know?" Lardo nudged Holster's legs and side with her feet. Holster responded by hooking one arm around her legs so she could not kick him and leaning back to crush her with his body weight. Ransom joined him in the dog pile. 

"Jealous, Lardo?"

"You guys suck! You're so heavy! Fuck!" Lardo was curled up sideways in the fetal position and laughing.

"We're your boys, right? Can't have you feeling left out." 

Bitty and Jack returned to the living room once they finished filming their segment with the frogs and Caitlin Farmer in the kitchen and found the three seniors giggling and apparently wrestling on the couch. "Lardo, sweetie, are you okay in there?"

"I'm fine!" She laughed. "I'd be better if these idiots stopped making out on top of me!"

"We're sharing the love, Lards!"

The men sat up and helped their pint-sized manager up as well. "You okay?" Holster asked her.

"I'm good," she replied and smacked him playfully in the arm. 

Jack looked confused and Bitty shook his head in mock disapproval. "Well, as long as nobody gets hurt..."

Lardo whispered to her fellow seniors and Bitty and Jack started leaving the room. "You might want to tell him soon, too."

"Shit, you're right. Bits! Come back for a sec!" Ransom called out and their younger teammate poked his head back into the room. "Holtzy's moving out with me after graduation."

Bitty let out a small distressed whisper. "Y'all need to stop reminding me that you're leaving this year..."

"No, he means we're moving _together_ ," Holster clarified.

"It's still up in the air exactly _where_  that will be--"

"--Probably Boston, because you're a genius and you'll definitely get into Harvard."

Lardo's face brightened at the mention of her hometown. "Dudes. You should def come to Boston."

"You're all going to live together?" Jack asked.

Lardo scoffed, and Ransom continued the explanation. "Well, no. This would be just me and Holster. I asked him to move with me no matter which school I get into, Harvard is just my top choice -- but either way, we're going to move in together. The two of us. Because we're _together_."

"Oh! That's nice. I'm glad you can stick together for a few more years, it's hard to imagine 'Ransom and Holster' as two separate people sometimes." Bitty laughed. "If y'all end up in Boston together it would make visiting so easy, too!"

"Well, the plan is for more than just a few years..."

"Rans, bro, they're not getting it. Kiss me," Holster instructed and Ransom wasted no time obliging.

"Huh?" Jack asked as he watched Ransom turn and kiss Holster deeply, one hand gently cupping his jaw. He looked to Lardo for an explanation and she simply held out one hand, palm up, as if presenting the couple kissing beside her. "Really?"

It took Bitty a moment to fully comprehend what he was seeing. Part of it felt strange to see his two friends kissing, but at the same time it seemed so normal for the pair that if they were to insist they were just 'bros' Bitty would wholeheartedly believe them. It always had been hard to put a finger on the exact nature of Ransom and Holster's relationship. It did not even sound out of the ordinary that they would continue living together after graduation. Even when Bitty tried to picture ten or twenty years down the road, the d-man pair were naturally still together. 

"So yeah, we're dating now," Holster said with a grin.

"Why so quiet, Bits?" Ransom asked. "Does it bother you a little?"

"No, the opposite actually..." Bitty was still deep in thought. "It's like, when I try to picture all of our futures... I _literally_ can't see either of you with anyone else."

Holster let out a short laugh and smiled at the man beside him. "Me neither."

"Barf." Lardo teased.

"This is... This makes a lot of sense. Congratulations, you guys." Jack nodded his head with a small smile. 

"About fucking time!" Dex suddenly called out from the kitchen and the sophomores all laughed. Evidently they could hear everything. Nursey was the only one studying at the kitchen table who did not already have a clue about what was going on between the co-captains, but the others quickly filled him in.

"Well, so much for being cautious about the team finding out that their captains are in a relationship. A third of them already know," Ransom chuckled and leaned into Holster's side.

Lardo checked her phone when it buzzed with an incoming text message. "Well, later brahs. Gotta skype Shitty." She hopped over the back of the couch on her way out of the living room. "Is it cool if I tell him about this?"

"Sure."

"Swawesome."

"Bittle," Jack slid one arm around Bitty's waist. "We have to finish the video."

"Time for the big announcement, Jack?" Ransom asked.

"Not quite. We're going to record a few more things to say over clips of from the team and campus. _Then_..." Bitty smiled up at his boyfriend. "Ready, sweetheart?"

"Yeah," Jack returned the smile. "Let's go."

Once they were alone again, Holster nuzzled against Ransom's neck. "I really love you, you know."

Ransom chuckled and kissed him. "I know, bro. I love you too."

"Good."

"So... Remember that feeling after I totally own you at MarioKart!" Ransom un-paused their video game with Holster's controller, tossing it to the other end of the couch and picking up his own.

"Fuck!" Holster gave him a playful shove before diving to grab his controller. "Dirty move, bro!" He laughed, scrambling to catch up.

"Forgive me?" Ransom grinned, his eyes trained on the TV.

" _This_  time. Not sure how I'll feel after a lifetime of you cheating in games," Holster teased back and they both laughed.

"All shrivelled and wrinkly and still playing MarioKart when we're in our eighties."

"You'll probably pass off your controller to some grandkid with much quicker reflexes than me."

"And you won't even notice because your eyesight will be so much worse by then. I'll have to hold your hand when we go for walks just so you won't get lost."

" _Only_ so I won't get lost?"

"Nah, I'll hold your hand anyway. We're going to be fucking adorable as grandpas, bro."

Holster glanced over at Ransom as they both reached the final stretch of the level. He knew realistically that it was strange to talk about growing old together -- even as a passing joke -- with someone you had been dating for less than a month, but things were different with Ransom. Things had always been different with Ransom. Holster was certain that there would never be anyone else for him -- there had not been anyone else for him since the day they met. Was this what people meant when they talked about 'soulmates'? He had always been skeptical, but their connection had been instant and strong, even when it was only a friendship. The uncertainty that had plagued him, especially over the past few months was gone. Holster knew Ransom felt the same way. Both men were all-in.

Ransom won the game, but Holster did not care about that anymore. He watched Ransom laughing as he cheered his own victory with a smile on his face. Ransom turned and gave him a quizzical look. "What is it?"

"Nothing, really. Do you believe in soulmates?"

Ransom scoffed. " _Obviously_ ," he said with a laugh, putting down his game controller then taking Holster's and doing the same. He grabbed his hand and pulled him off the couch.

"What are we doing?"

"We're going upstairs right now because it's tacky to make out on the couch in a house full of people."

Holster laughed. "I approve this plan. Lead the way." He closed in behind Ransom, kissing him on the back of his neck by his ear as they reached the attic door. "Just making out?"

"Obviously _not_ ," Ransom said with a grin handing him the jockstrap to hang on the outer doorknob. "We better put on some music, you're a loud dude."

"Pfft! I can keep my voice down if I want to."

" _I_  don't want you to."

Holster gripped he doorknob to steady himself when his knees weakened. Everything was new still, but he could definitely get used to this. He hurried after his boyfriend and pulled him down onto the bottom bunk. They kissed eagerly, in between short bursts of happy laughter. Holster let out a low moan and Ransom looked at him with a raised eyebrow. "Shit. Okay, music. I got it," he said with another laugh, tuning to a random pop station on his phone.

Ransom chuckled when he heard the song playing. "This song reminds me of you," he admitted.

"Why?" 

"We danced to it at that last house party when we kissed."

"You remember the song that was playing?"

"Yeah. It also played while we were talking after Hausgiving."

"You remember that much?" Holster chuckled too.

"You don't?"

"Well, to be honest..." Holster hesitated. "I mostly just remember you. I didn't pay much attention to anything else. Is that weird?"

Ransom smiled and kissed him. "Nah, bro, I'm okay with that."

"Good."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow. This update was much later than I expected it to be. I've been so distracted this past week.  
> I hope you enjoyed reading the story! Whatever you do, don't picture Adorable Holsom Grandpas(TM) holding hands and playing silly little pranks on each other with the help of the Adorable Holsom Grandkids(TM). Don't picture it. Just don't. You did it, didn't you?

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave a comment if you enjoyed the story! Feedback is greatly appreciated!
> 
> Check out my "Holsom Dads" tag on tumblr (@tdkeh) for headcanons about them and their adorable future children


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